Guilt No More Resolutions

It's the new year, the beginning of a new decade. Time for resolutions.

1. Write resolutions on January 9. It is way, way too hard to get to it on January 1, when your house looks like a bomb exploded in the living room and the cousins slept over, such that you know you will be dealing with emotional overload in your own kids along about 2 p.m.

2. This is the year I am REALLY going to make sure that all the pots and pans are washed before I go to bed. No more breakfast prep whilst dodging slimy, soaking pasta pans. No more dragging bathrobe sleeves through last night's paprikash. It's a new year!

3. I resolve to get rid of a bunch of stuff. Considering how stuffed to the gills this house is, there has to be some stuff stuffed away somewhere that I can stuff in the dumpster.

4. This year I will be more vigilant about making the boys clip their fingernails regularly. Nail care has never been my strong suit, but when the ten-year-old begins to look like a vampire from the wrist down, it becomes apparent that something must be done. And I'm the woman to do it. I think.

5. This is the year that I get serious about making bread. The stuff that you get at the store is so nasty it almost begs to be made into craft glue. However, this is a GNoM resolution and thus null and void where any or all of the following pertain: pregnancy; long spates of upper respiratory infections; laundry buildup; discovery of new interesting novelists; general malaise.

6. 2010 is when I work out a system for keeping the yard tidy. Not that it will involve much labor on my part, mind you. I plan to watch the child slaves through the window whilst I munch my homemade bread and read interesting new novels.

7. Keep Superguy from taking over the desk! It is currently almost clean. He will fill it to overflowing with his own quirky method of filing stuff. No marriage should be made to endure sharing a desk. A bit vague on how to accomplish this.

8. An anti-resolution. This is not the year to get all concerned about dusting.

9. There ought to be a couple of resolutions about my treatment of those around me, but since this is the GNoM list, and therefore wry and snide ("wride"?) , I'll just say that real resolutions would include being more kind, turning off the radio so that the children and husband can have my undivided attention, saying yes to easy requests, praying absolutely without fail every morning, Rosaries, etc.

10. It seems to me that many younger moms could benefit from seeing the true Guilt No More lifestyle. This is the year to post more photos.