The Guilt No More Blog

GNoM Housekeeping -- helpful illustrations

2010-05-13T22:07:00.002-05:00

Sometimes a woman gets down about her housekeeping. She looks around at the rooms she's tried so hard to keep organized, and sighs. "I just cleaned it, and it's all messy again!" she wails. Well, ladies, as a public service, I offer you Guilt No More Housekeeping over here at Castle Bessy.

Here is what my daughters' bedroom looks like.
Don't you feel better? Is there any room in your house that looks even half as atrocious as this? Come on. You know this photo makes you feel better.

Superguy, in a yet further attempt to help the girls organize their heaps, put up useful shelves. The girls crammed everything on there. And still it looks like it does. (By the way, I was the one who stacked the books upright like that. Had I not done so, those books would be under the laundry on the floor.)
Yes, this is our 18-month-old Honeybee. She's brushing her teeth. In bed. Note that this is actually a bunk bed, with two singles shoved in sideways on the bottom. This is how we fit four girls in a 10 x 12 room.
Lest you think that the girls are at all unusual in the family, here's Truckster's dresser.

We're here for you. We want you to know, here at Guilt No More Housekeeping, that whatever you're doing, it's way better than what we're doing.

Now go look at your reasonably clean bedrooms and pour yourself a cup of hot tea. Messy Bessy has to go sleep for about 35 hours to get over the shame of all this chaos.

Crap Chairs -- Black Hole

2010-04-28T19:09:00.002-05:00

This is where you end up, when you begin to collect crap chairs:If this chair were a sickness, it would be psoriasis.

If this chair were architecture, it would be Communist Block High Rise.

If this chair were food, it would be Vegemite.

It now resides in our living room and has already garnished two (2) apparently sincere compliments. If only I could tap into that mindset, the one which appreciates this type of furniture: the 60's wayside motel kind. People might just have been kind so they didn't have to say their real feelings, however.

Updates on Casper

2010-04-28T18:47:00.002-05:00

You may have been wondering about Casper, our invisible Bassett hound. What does he look like when he's not invisible? Well, he's just your regular Bassett hound, and has a droopy sweet face. Fifi illustrates:Isn't this cute? Casper and Bootsie, curled up together. They're best friends! Amazingly, Casper jumped right up there, onto Buster's top bunk. He's got skills.
But this is even cuter, isn't it? Here's Truckster, snuggling with Casper under the blankets. You'd think he might mind the bad breath. But Casper seems not to mind anything!
Casper is also a very intelligent dog. He uses Truckster's electronics set. Look at that. He's completing a circuit! Arrf!

Perhaps someday Casper can show us how to get grass to grow in the mud yard outside.

Guilt No More Saturday!

2010-04-17T15:53:00.003-05:00

You can see that we are busy, busy people here in the Land of Origin, where the skies are deep blue, the soil is always rich, and the yard is always a mud pit from Hades. Below, view the latest home improvement that Superguy has been working on: enclosing what had been the weedy, rocky, littered, rutted ruins of a garage apron. We hope that having this enclosed will give us a few more feet for our Mud Reclamation Project.Saturday is when the hearts of all women turn toward baking. At least, in this house. And so, Sweetums and Kewpie are at work making two loaves of healthy, yummy banana bread. These are currently perfuming the household while they bake.
Meanwhile, you may wonder, is Thrifty Frugal Cheap-Like-Scrooge Messy Bessy doing anything to help her family eat well, and if so, does it only involve the grocery store? Mais non, my little friends. Here you can see that we have transplanted the seedlings that began life under the grow lights in the basement. These are pumpkins.
Disregard the weeds. (This is a GNoM garden anyway. We've got weeds.) Instead, focus on the tulips, which predate us in this location! They come up year after year, to gladden the heart of Messy Bessy as she stands gazing out the spattered window at the Guilt No More sink, washing a mountainous pile of nasty pots and pans.

Also, note the two rhubarb plants. An older lady who lives down the block had a massive number of the plants and knew that I love rhubarb, and so she gave me a couple. She wanted me to take more, but frankly, I don't have any more room! And I myself, with my trusty shovel, went over there and just dug these babies out of her dirt and inserted them in mine! And they grew! It's like a miracle!
Anyway, I ended up running out of steam, and furthermore, there is always laundry, like my evil familiar (instead of a black cat, I have a basket of filthy socks). So Fifi went out and showed how much her paternal grandmother's talents have found a home in her: she planted our pea shoots and strung twine for them to climb, she planted nastertiums and tried to revive our sorry little tomato seedlings. Wow. The yard looks great!
Saturdays are so happy when there's sun and a lot of kids to just work. At the end of the day, we're going to have a clean yard, banana bread, and a semi-planted garden.

And my input? Moral support!!!!

Feeling down -- let's have photos!

2010-04-09T22:19:00.004-05:00

Isn't this a lovely photo? This is a quite common sight in the house. People eating and reading all at once. We have such nice light in the morning.This was one of the Bataan Death March of photos on Easter morning. Truckster just could not resist the temptation to make faces, and Fifi has her maternal grandmother's trick of always having her eyes closed (or almost closed) for any photo. Here is a pretty good one. Check out Buster's tie -- it's not a clip-on!
Easter eggs drying.
The choristers getting ready to go praise God with their voices. And boy, was Our Lady of Many Large Families packed! It looked like a Chevy Express convention in the parking lot. (As a side note, from where I was standing, this appeared to be the Easter of Women in Tight White Dress Slacks. There were three just in my view. Why was I not alerted? I just wore a beige sweater skirt. Hopelessly unfashionable. Of course, Tight White Dress Slacks would look ridiculous on my pregnancy-mashed figure. But it would have been nice to have gotten the memo!)

Happy Easter to the Family of Origin Diaspora!

Guilt No More laundry -- Lenten edition

2010-03-28T21:58:00.003-05:00

This is not a joke.The ironing board stack.

Go away for the weekend, avoid menial work on the Lord's Day, and this is what you get!
Happy Holy Week. If you want to find me, I'll be praying in the basement.

Crap chairs, part 3 -- oh yeah, baby

2010-03-21T21:10:00.003-05:00

If this chair were a car, it would be our old Vanagon: faint traces of style, underneath layers and layers of misery.This is one of the few pieces of furniture -- oh, OK, the only piece -- that I ever refinished myself. It used to be standard 70's brown, and I updated it! It had a fuzzy pink seat, which used to look halfway nice when it was owned by my long-suffering parents. What you see here is blue vinyl (cheap!) and black spray paint. It never looked VERY nice, but at this point, we're just hoping that the arson fairy visits soon and takes JUST THIS CHAIR. Even the smoldering heap of blackened sticks will be preferable to what this is now. And Sweetums can sit on a pile of phone books, since we get a new stack of them every three weeks here in the City Where Nothing is Allowed.

Crap chairs, part 2

2010-03-13T19:08:00.002-06:00

If this chair were music, it would be the Beatles last album -- the one they would have released when they were eighty-five.This excrescence used to be a plain old beige recliner. We found it (on the boulevard) when it had already had a long full life in front of someone's TV. But soon after, this crap chair had a major disabling life event: it died. The arms are almost off, and the recliner part falls off when you sit down. Not to mention that it was no color to begin with and is now a dirty no-color.

We'd put it back on the boulevard but we are too embarrassed, because the boulevard we found it on is our next-door-neighbor's. We can't bear to see them smirk when they find it no longer usable, on our boulevard.

Crap Chairs, part 1

2010-03-09T19:12:00.001-06:00

If this chair were in Grandpa's house, he would call it the "magic chair," because magic duct tape is the only thing holding it together. Also because some kind of curse must have been placed upon us such that we have had this chair for so long. Has it been a year and a day? Where is the prince to come and kiss this odious toad?

Well, tonight a princess did the deed for us, albeit not with a kiss but with her backside. She sat in it. How dare she? And it broke. The seat broke right off. I guess the spell on the duct tape had been finally broken.

We will not be posting the picture of this nasty thing broken. Just imagine it, though. We'll be throwing it in the river where it belongs very very soon.

Stay tuned for more Crap Chairs. This series is conceived and photographed, and co-written, by Buster, the guy with an eye for chairs.

What isn't working around here -- and what is

2010-03-05T14:51:00.002-06:00

Here is an area of our Guilt No More castle that the scullery maid (me) insists does not work. There are too many things going on: lined up items to be put in the recycling bags (which are nestled behind the right door), aprons hung over brackets since I am too sissy to learn how to use a drill properly, the paper-recycling brown bag, the garbage, and the totally necessary but incredibly irritating laundry hamper. Not to mention, the yard stick! Never tell me we don't utilize our shelf brackets! Oh yeah, and look at the empty milk jug. We have so many of these I begin to feel they are sort of like pets.

How would we make this better? It is ridiculously easy, once I take the time to think about it. But the only way I can bear to think about it -- and this corner of our kitchen has annoyed me seriously for years!!! -- is to blog about it. Pathetic, yet true.

As I was saying, it wouldn't be hard to make this an easier corner to live with. First, put the recycling under the sink, rather than in the back hall. Next, install a hook for the aprons (which since this photo was taken has actually happened). Next, remove the laundry hamper and find another place for it. Maybe the back hall! Never tell me we don't utilize our back hall! It's a Mud Room. And by mud, I mean mud.
Now, having glutted ourselves in our filthy disorganization, let us turn our little eyes happily to a place in the house that is currently working, and which is now so nice I had to take a photo from every angle: The Red Room. And by red I do mean red.

As you stand in the doorway this is what you see to the right. A desk with enough space. Bookshelves properly filled.
And here, below, you see almost straight ahead. Note the little window seat that my dear Superguy made since he knows I've always wanted one. Of course, it's too narrow to accommodate my motherly self, but see the last photo of this post for its ultimate use. And note also here, more bookshelves, the pretty rocker that doesn't fit anywhere else, and the sole closet on the main floor, which houses the vacuum! The vacuum misses the back hall, but I don't care. It has to stay here, forever and ever.
And here is what you would see if you stepped in and pivoted to the left. Look! More shelves! And the homeschool dresser, another desk which a child could sit at (and they do!), and a white board which has subsequently been consigned to the Dumpster because someone wrote on it with a Sharpie instead of the approved marker. Never tell me we don't use our Dumpster.
Oh. My. Heavens! Look at the window seat. It is fulfilling its very raison d'etre -- little girl cousins, dressed as princesses, reading. In the sunlight. In a room that works.
It fills me with glee.

February snow day

2010-02-09T12:48:00.003-06:00

Sometimes you have to spend a day remembering that there's some color in the world other than white.

Winter vacation

2010-01-17T13:12:00.002-06:00

This is the familiar scene in this household when the weather is cold -- some combination of kids, a blanket, and a stack of books. We love this sight.

Although it has technically been a school vacation, the reading, writing and learning haven't stopped. Truckster even got out the math workbook and did a bunch. A houseful of books for a houseful of kids. Our cup overflows.

A Great Day

2010-01-12T11:45:00.002-06:00

While dear messybessy makes productive and wise New Year's resolutions, I have to admit, my resolution for 2010 is... to have more days like today.

My excellent day actually starts yesterday, when baby had her neurology visit. She had to have an EEG, which is no fun because they have to stick like 25 leads to your head, and you can't even touch the pretty, colorful wires to which they attach, but Baby, true to form, behaved like a complete champ. She hardly fussed at all, and even fell asleep while they were monitoring her, which is exactly what they want. And then, best of all, when we saw the RN she said the the EEG looked great and that we can finally start (SLOWLY) weaning her off of her medicine!! Thanks be to God and thanks to everyone who prayed for our Little Bell!!

So, with news like that yesterday, today has to be good. And, sure enough, today we rose (if slightly earlier than this mama wanted) to a cold but beautiful, clear Florida day. Mama and baby were able to see Daddy off to work, and then had a quiet start to the day. Mama was productive enough to make an egg for breakfast, as well as the usual toast, and then baby played while mama read her interesting book ("Mr. Langshaw's Square Piano" by Madeline Goold, thanks to dad for that one). Halfway through the morning baby went down for a good nap. This nap actually allowed mama to take a bath to clean up (amazing!) as well as start the dishwasher. Baby awoke from her nap in a pleasant mood, and mama and baby just finished a delicious lunch (really - see next post for details) together. This afternoon, by now about 50 degrees outside, we will set out for a walk to our local library. Tonight there is a wives' get-together at the coffee shop near our house, and sweet daddy has agreed to watch baby while mama goes out, saying, "We'll get some junk food, crack open a soda or two, and wrestle or play with dolls or something fun. My only stipulation about this evening is that you have fun and don't worry about me and baby." Daddy is simply the best, isn't he?

Oh, and did I mention that I have chocolate brownies, fudge, AND chocolate bars in the house?

Ahh, 2010, you are shaping up to be an excellent year.

Guilt No More Resolutions

2010-01-09T08:37:00.002-06:00

It's the new year, the beginning of a new decade. Time for resolutions.

1. Write resolutions on January 9. It is way, way too hard to get to it on January 1, when your house looks like a bomb exploded in the living room and the cousins slept over, such that you know you will be dealing with emotional overload in your own kids along about 2 p.m.

2. This is the year I am REALLY going to make sure that all the pots and pans are washed before I go to bed. No more breakfast prep whilst dodging slimy, soaking pasta pans. No more dragging bathrobe sleeves through last night's paprikash. It's a new year!

3. I resolve to get rid of a bunch of stuff. Considering how stuffed to the gills this house is, there has to be some stuff stuffed away somewhere that I can stuff in the dumpster.

4. This year I will be more vigilant about making the boys clip their fingernails regularly. Nail care has never been my strong suit, but when the ten-year-old begins to look like a vampire from the wrist down, it becomes apparent that something must be done. And I'm the woman to do it. I think.

5. This is the year that I get serious about making bread. The stuff that you get at the store is so nasty it almost begs to be made into craft glue. However, this is a GNoM resolution and thus null and void where any or all of the following pertain: pregnancy; long spates of upper respiratory infections; laundry buildup; discovery of new interesting novelists; general malaise.

6. 2010 is when I work out a system for keeping the yard tidy. Not that it will involve much labor on my part, mind you. I plan to watch the child slaves through the window whilst I munch my homemade bread and read interesting new novels.

7. Keep Superguy from taking over the desk! It is currently almost clean. He will fill it to overflowing with his own quirky method of filing stuff. No marriage should be made to endure sharing a desk. A bit vague on how to accomplish this.

8. An anti-resolution. This is not the year to get all concerned about dusting.

9. There ought to be a couple of resolutions about my treatment of those around me, but since this is the GNoM list, and therefore wry and snide ("wride"?) , I'll just say that real resolutions would include being more kind, turning off the radio so that the children and husband can have my undivided attention, saying yes to easy requests, praying absolutely without fail every morning, Rosaries, etc.

10. It seems to me that many younger moms could benefit from seeing the true Guilt No More lifestyle. This is the year to post more photos.

Christmas tree acquisition

2009-12-20T16:00:00.002-06:00

Superguy and Messy Bessy have almost always, except for one regrettable year, gone out into somebody's woods to chop the Christmas tree down. This year, despite our financial circumstances, we were blessed by so many people's generosity that we were able to do the same thing we always do. If you are one of those generous people, please look at the photos below and think about how much happiness you have given. We had a wonderful time and the kids about died they were so thrilled to be out getting a tree (finally!):

Oh yeah? Well, this is MY life...

2009-12-20T15:54:00.002-06:00

Our beautiful new mum AMM wrote a post below that far exceeds any of the posts I've written. Please read it to see how wise she is for one not yet 30. I fully agree with everything she says. But I could not resist entering a slightly smirky set of photos to show where she is going to be, eleven years and five more children from now:

Welcome to my world.

This is My Life Now

2009-12-16T09:55:00.006-06:00

Sometimes it seems humdrum, with lots of laundry, making meals, picking up the house, running after baby. I spend most of my time at home and outings usually consist of trips to the public library. We have 4 rooms in our house (not counting bathrooms and closets), where I spend 90% of my time. Sometimes I remember what it was like to be out among other adults (or college students, not quite the same thing) all day; what it was like to go out late at night or hang out with friends every other evening; what it was like to be in school and studying and meeting new people and working...

And then I remember, it wasn't that great. It had its attractions obviously, and looking back it is easy to remember the fun parts, but it wasn't what I wanted. I had the freedom of a single twenty-something and, you know, it was often pretty lonely and unfulfilling. Why? Because this was what I wanted:

And so, I remember these things and then I remember how amazingly blessed I am. I am honestly so lucky to have a wonderful husband to cook for and a sweet daughter to run after. I am blessed to have a nice house to try to keep clean and a nice library where I can take baby. This is my life and this is the life I always wanted. Lucky me!

Honeybee goes to bed

2009-12-08T13:56:00.000-06:00

At long last! Order now!

2009-12-08T13:41:00.002-06:00

You have been thinking hard about a suitable present for that special someone on your Christmas list. You considered a bottle of whiskey, a set of silk pajamas, and theater tickets. But you rejected those options as entirely mediocre. What could you give that would really make an impression?

We here at Guilt No More have the answer! It's the Guilt No More Completely Furnished Kitchen! Already used, and so messy that your loved one will not feel bad spilling hamburger fat on the (already filthy) floor! Behold.

One of the nicest features is that this kitchen is Green. Note the recycled bread bags dripping dry over the desk lamp, which was itself recycled from a different location.
Yes, Auntie Loretta will definitely go for this one.
Another nice feature is that since there is no counter space -- AT ALL -- the happy gift recipient doesn' t have to feel guilty that she isn't cooking dinner tonight. She can't! Our Lady of Guadalupe looks down, presumably praying for the owner of this kitchen. Order now!

Simple pleasures here at Casa Almond

2009-11-29T20:12:00.002-06:00

For a late Thanksgiving post, I'm going to offer to the three of you who feel obliged to check this blog a partial list of simple pleasures for which I am grateful. No matter how little disposable income a person has, these are things that make her feel rich.

A tablecloth and cloth napkins. Note the Guilt No More candle -- you could have it too! Just send $7.99.
New curtains, using beautiful fabric that my lovely sister-in-law gave me years ago. Bonus: they actually block out sight, unlike the sheers we'd been limping along with.
A crock pot full of homemade chili using the cheapest of ingredients: dried beans, ground turkey, canned tomatoes, bulk spices. It was good, but even better, it was ready to eat when we needed it, almost no work for me.
Banana muffins. Why bake 12 when you can bake 24?
A happy, healthy, loving family. The richest of riches.

This is Guilt No more blogging!

2009-11-14T21:41:00.002-06:00

No worries -- there's no theme here. Just plain old photos, for your viewing pleasure, if it is that.

Here below, meet the extraordinary lump of dough which ultimately became seven (7) (siete) loaves of bread. It was fun to make. It lasted us about a week.Kewpie and Honeybee, enjoying the bath.

These three good-looking people are in the children's choir at Our Lady of Many Big Families. We went through some difficulties trying to find clothes to suit the daughters.
Truckster is a Cub Scout!
I should have posted this when it happened, but here are Buster and Fifi on the first day of school at O.L.M.B.F. Note that Buster's sweatshirt already had a stain on it.

Be serious

2009-11-04T20:03:00.003-06:00

He wants you to know that he's in the Breadwinner Protection Program. Do not attempt to contact him. He is Incognito.

Fruit from our garden

2009-11-04T19:57:00.002-06:00

If I had rotated this picture, it would be perfect. Of course, I don't know how to rotate it. So tip your head, and you can see that we actually grew all these things this year! The pumpkin is still on our porch, looking autumnal. The grapes we didn't eat, because the one kitchen tool that I need to de-seed them I no longer own (a food mill, totally necessary item that Target does not stock.). And the pepper and tomato -- yum!

Absurdly proud.

Where have we been?

2009-11-03T21:14:00.004-06:00

OK, it's been kind of a while. Sorry. So, to make up for it, here are some All Hallows' Eve pictures.

From the left, St. Gianna Molla, St. Helena (of the True Cross), Pope John Paul II, St. Margaret of Scotland (pictured before she was married to Malcolm, and still an English princess), and St. Juan Diego.

(True to form, Juan Diego chose his own saint but then got irritated by the costume and refused to look happy for the photo. However, there was another Juan Diego at the All Saints' party and he was nowhere as Mexicano as this dude. Although, we were hoping he would let us paint a mustache on him, but he put his foot down. "No way, Jose!" were the words he would have spoken, if he had expressed his displeasure verbally than otherwise.)

Mohawk boy

2009-07-26T22:47:00.001-05:00

Can you even handle it?

Fifi's Sophie Doll

2009-07-26T15:06:00.003-05:00

Hello, every family member out there! my mom made the suggestion that I put my creation
on the blog, so I guess I will!

anyway, a long time ago, my grandma gave me an extremely complicated ( well, I thought it was complicated .) pattern for a doll. this pattern, this six page nightmare for sewing beginners, made me more than a little intimidated.

At first glance, I had a brief suspicion that It was printed in some sort of Egyptian Hieroglyphs,
but i then saw that it was upside down. the cutting out alone took so long that i hoped I'd be done before I was twenty.

but it went fairly well after that, up until the hair. I did the best i could, but Sophie still has a
bald spot on top of her head.

so that is how i made Sophie, the learning doll.

God Bless, Fifi

Perspective

2009-07-26T10:31:00.003-05:00

"Barring obstacles that God Himself may permit, ordinarily, when a couple marries, they should desire and gladly accept a large family."

This quote is from The Catholic Family Handbook by Fr. Lawrence Lovasik, published by Sophia Institute Press, in 1962. When I read this, I realized how much of the world's attitudes have crept into my thinking of late -- the attitude that one must, in some sense, apologize for having so many children. That the presumption should be towards a small family, and then with proof of "ability" or "good circumstances" or something, one could very cautiously and with a great deal of trepidation open one's marriage to another baby.

Fr. Lovasik goes on: "Beware of false arguments against having a large family: A large family costs too much ... Having many children wears a woman out before she reaches middle age ... You cannot give all your children an expensive education when you have a large family ... You cannot keep a neat, orderly home with many children." Each of these falsehoods he counters neatly and succinctly -- you have to read the book to find out what he says.

But notice -- he says nothing about inability to love so many, or to have time to yourself, or that many children would put a strain on marriage. These are the lies of the present day. I'd like to answer them, succinctly if possible:

Ordinary parents find it difficult to spread around their love to many children. This is such a juvenile objection and yet so present even in Catholic circles. Obviously, God doesn't dole out a certain amount of parental love to each person, like blood cells or number of teeth. Love is mystical; it increases through the exercise of itself -- each time a new baby comes, a parent's heart finds itself bigger, more tender, not only able but eager to love actively, and without taking from any other child. In fact, having a new baby in the house often increases everyone's love for everyone else!

Having many children prevents you from having time to yourself, without which you will go crazy or lose your personality. Fr. Lovasik actually answers this objection really well in the book, so do read it, but here's my two cents. Most of us in the U.S. have had a spoiled upbringing in this regard. We get used to having hours each day to "unwind," to "relax," to "veg." That isn't by itself sinful, except that it gets us thinking that this is our right. But we are Christians -- our time is not our own but is given to us to build His kingdom and serve Him. And we can only serve Him by serving others. To be "poured out as an offering." Now, every person does need to have a little bit of time alone, to pray and think and pursue personal interests. But you can do that with a lot of children. Witness me blogging -- bathrobe and all. And as to losing your personality, this is cowardice before God's providence; He gave us our selves and He alone will perfect our selves. "Whoever seeks to save his life will lose it," etc etc.

A large family puts a strain on a marriage. Again, Fr. Lovasik answers this perfectly. He says, "The responsibilities of the family develop your God-given powers and help you to mature spiritually, mentally, and physically ... A person who has never surrendered whole-heartedly to any purpose outside himself remains immature all his life." I fully agree.

However, I do think that the world of the 21st century is different than when Lovasik was writing -- it's far more inimical to marriage and duty. Thus, in a way this objection is somewhat truer today. Nothing in American culture today is geared toward a family with more than two children. Everything -- housing costs, housing sizes, school and sports obligations, even the size of hotel rooms and serving amounts listed in recipes -- is aimed at the two-child and two-income family. Trying to raise a large family on one income is today something sort of like being the only immigrant in the neighborhood -- everyone stares, nothing is set up for your way of life, no one understands your language -- and it is wearing at times. And this can certainly put a strain on a marriage. The key, of course, is prayer, Mass, and a healthy dose of surrender. Which is what we're called to as Catholics anyway. In an atmosphere of prayer and solidarity, a large family cannot help but pull a husband and wife closer together. A large family provides a great many more opportunities to love. Love is the only thing worth anything in this world. It's the only thing worth pouring yourself out for, and it's the only thing that returns to you, a thousand-fold, fresher and stronger than it left you.

Earth mama

2009-07-22T12:47:00.002-05:00

This is not the only thing I do with my days, despite how it feels sometimes. (One of the many enjoyable things about nursing is that it allows you to take little snatches of time and read your book. I've read probably ten thousand books in this manner since I first became a nursing mother 12 years ago.)

Another thing I do is bake, and since AMM my venerable sister asked for the recipe for Peasant Bread, mentioned in an earlier post, I here oblige. She's an earth mama in training, so she needs this recipe.

This is Peasant Bread, from a small book called A Family Journal: A Homeschooling Mother's Companion, by Rita Munn. You can order it from the Catholic Heritage Curricula website, www.chcweb.com. And while it isn't something that will set the world on fire, it's quite a nice little book, and very reassuring and fun to read when you are new to homeschooling.

In a mixing bowl, stir together 2 cups of very warm water (approx. 110 degrees F) and 3 teaspoons of active dry yeast (or one of those little overpriced packets). Let stand about five minutes until yeast begins to "proof," or foam.

In a larger bowl, combine 2 cups white bread flour with 2 teaspoons salt (ground sea salt is what is recommended, but I'm not into fancy salt. Yet.) Then add the proofed yeast/water mixture and 1 tablespoon good olive oil, and stir vigorously for 2 minutes.

Gradually add up to 3 cups of flour, whole wheat or white, until it is too stiff to stir. Turn out and knead until smooth and elastic, or only until it forms a ball. Munn says, "Kneading the dough is not essential to this rustic loaf. Remember, this is peasant bread made for everyday eating."

Let dough ball rise, covered, until it doubles in bulk (1-2 hours). (I personally do this by plopping it onto the floury counter where I kneaded it, rub a bit of olive oil over the top, and turn the mixing bowl upside down over it. Also, I've never let this rise for a full 2 hours, since I never have that sort of time.

When it's risen, preheat your oven to 425. Punch down the dough and on a floured counter divide it in half. Press each into a round disk and loosely shape the dough into a flat loaf -- you could slash the tops of the loaves now, but I never do. Place each onto a greased pan or baking stone. Munn says to let it rise again until doubled (which would probably take about 45 minutes to an hour) but I never do. It would definitely make them taste good and have a better texture.

Bake for about 30-40 minutes. You might want to reduce the temperature to 375 if you find the tops getting to dark. Do your ordinary test to make sure the loaves are done.

Let cool on a rack until ready to serve. Munn says, "We like to serve this bread by passing the loaf around the table so everyone can tear off small pieces." We do the same thing, and the kids really love it.

Thanks be to God!

2009-07-20T12:21:00.003-05:00

I have to take a minute to thank God for 2 wonderful blessings of this past weekend! First and foremost, our little daughter has now passed 2 nights without any noticeable seizures - the first time in months! This is such a gift, a light of hope to a very concerned mama. She had a hard night in other ways last night, but no seizures, so my heart is glad!!

And to add to the joy of a seizure free night, yesterday afternoon we got to see our little girl giggle and laugh with delight in a way I have only seen once before. Mama was dancing around and singing silly music while daddy held her, and baby smiled the biggest, sweetest grin and then giggled and giggled. Both mommy and daddy laughed too and almost cried at such a gift from God.

I am so thankful, and praise God for his Mercy and compassion. I am also so grateful for all the prayers of others for our little girl. I hope that we will have many more days and nights like these!!

More Simple Summer Soup Suppers...

2009-07-19T12:52:00.003-05:00

Yes, nothing gets amm inspired quite like talking about food, so I am now allowing my little one to be crazy in her little "exer-saucer" (a fabulous containerizing toy) whilst I contribute my two new favorite dinners, which tie in perfectly with messybessy's lovely homemade supper. The summer soup, i.e. the incredibly easy vegetable based soup, is one of the best things for the "mom-on-the-go" or the "mom-not-going-anywhere-but-still-not-feeling-like-slaving-over-the stove". My two new faves are a SUPER easy (but delish!) tomato soup and a similarly idiot-proof corn chowder.

The tomato soup came about when my lovely husband and I ate at Panera once. Panera is a good place for a sandwich and cup of soup, and we partook of their "Creamy Tomato Bisque" or some such fancy name. The soup was tasty, but I just KNEW that this chain restaurant wasn't smashing up fresh tomatoes for this, and if they weren't, how hard is it to open a can of tomatoes myself? And how much cheaper? Sure enough, I picked up a large can of diced tomatoes (actually truth be told I picked up the basil, herb diced tomatoes, even easier) added it to some sauteed onions, poured in chicken broth (no, not homemade - though homemade would be delicious), warmed it through, put it into the blender and whirred it until the "desired consistency" then poured it back into the pot and added a smidgeon of heavy cream. My darling husband had the brilliant suggestion of adding crushed red pepper (really a must) and that was that! Served with cheese crostadas, or simply good old grilled cheese it can't be beat.

The awesome corn chowder is possibly even easier. This one started with an actualy recipe I had for southwestern corn chowder, but hit its final simplicity when I couldn't even be bothered to make that recipe fully. This simple corn chowder is utterly basic: sautee your mirapoix (a fancier way of saying carrots, onion, and celery - i.e. your standard fridge veggies) and you can do potato too, but I actually forgot it last time and it was still great after all corn has plenty of starch in it. Next add some chicken stock (again not homemade in my case) and some thyme, cook until desired consistency. Add LOTS of corn (either leftovers from corn on the cob, or frozen works great) and a dollop of heavy cream (doesn't havy cream make everything better?). THE ONLY SECRET: jalapeno. Yes, a diced jalapeno added in with your mirapoix at the beginning is what makes this soup lip smacking delicious. Jalapenos are a new ingredient in my life, and I must just say my life is better for having them. Now, to be sure, most chowders, including the original recipe I learned, includes bacon in the chowder. This is yummy, but I have to admit, I actually prefer it without. For one thing, I can't be bothered to stink up the kitchen frying bacon (our range hood is pretty much worthless) just to add a little smokiness to some easy vegetable soup, but also I honestly feel that bacon, although DELICIOUS on its own, tends to overpower other ingredients, especially in a summer soup like this one. Anyway, I served this chowder with some yummy and very easy beer-thyme biscuits (even easier than normal biscuits, because you add melted butter instead of cutting in cold butter - plus there's beer in them) - hurrah for more simple suppers!!

p.s. messybessy, I would love a recipe for that peasant bread -done in 2 hours?!
p.p.s. I know that the corn chowder also lacks a little something which is extremely important to all Pease women - that is protein. What can I say... have a slice of cheese with it or a ham sandwich or something...

Evolution of motherhood

2009-07-17T20:01:00.004-05:00

When our oldest, Fifi, was this age and doing this, (and wearing the same little yellow track suit!), I used to get mad. All those books, spread out all over the floor for me to pick up -- again. Dang!

Now, I'm just really glad she's not eating the marbles, pennies, Legos, hairballs, dried cherries, dice, Tylenol tablets, and rusty nails that are lying around.

A homemade meal

2009-07-17T19:52:00.002-05:00

Meatless Fridays all through the year have been a hard thing for me to do. This is silly, since I love a great many kinds of vegetarian dishes, and have made many since learning to cook. However, meat is definitely the easiest to eat since you just bake it and serve...

Here's the dinner I made tonight though: What I'm calling "Spirit of Minnesota Soup" and Peasant Bread that I started at 4:30 and put on the table, still warm, at 6:30.

The soup is actually leftover soup. I took chicken broth that I needed to use up, added frozen cooked wild rice, frozen diced tomatoes, a few carrots and potatoes, a can of white beans, and the leftover yellow peppers out of a salad from yesterday. Oh, and some oregano from the garden. With salt, pepper, and a little thyme it was completely delicious.

The bread is so good. The recipe is from something called the Homeschooling Journal (or similar title) and it is little reflections on homeschooling a large family, and included are some recipes and ideas for various dinners. The key with this bread is that you don't need to be careful about it. It should get eaten the day it's baked, and you tear it up instead of slicing it. Yum!

Summer love

2009-07-11T17:24:00.002-05:00

You thought this was going to be about something else, didn't you? No no no, my little friend. This is about my love for this bedraggled, bespattered appliance. With this baby, I can make this:
That's homemade pesto, ma cherie, made from home-grown basil, and it is accompanied by home-grown tomatoes, as you see. Those did not come from hydroponic pods. They grew next to our garage, which if you squint real hard looks sort of like an Italian peasant's humble cottage.

Oh, do I love pesto. Here's the recipe, which if you use my summer love shown above, you can make in five minutes.

2 cups packed basil leaves, washed and dried
1/2 cup olive oil
3 tablespoons pine nuts, but I used chopped walnuts
2-3 cloves of garlic, chopped

Put all this in the processor and blend until smooth and your knees start to get weak. Then, mix in:
1/2 cup parmesan cheese -- must be real, not the canned stuff
3 tablespoons romano cheese, or more of the parm
3-4 tablespoons very soft butter (I used 3 because I am timid)

Ladle on top of 1.5 pounds of noodles, dilute with a bit of the noodle cooking water, mix, and eat.

Keel over with love!

Some great photos of our vacation -- plus...

2009-07-11T17:09:00.003-05:00

Here's the defining moment of our lovely little family vacation: this black bear, who came right out onto the dock hoping to find leftover bratwurst, or chips, or maybe blueberry cobbler. All he found was a used diaper (not pictured) which he played with in an adorable way. At least, it was adorable if one didn't consider that he could easily remove any little child's face with those paws.

Sweetums and Truckster. They never left the cabin without life jackets, which made for a relaxing time for us.
Can you even stand it? Kewpie went out with Superguy and her brother to sample the delights of canoeing on the lake. Here is how they delivered her. When we got her up to the cabin, we discovered that while she was sleeping, the horse flies had just about severed her poor little ankle -- it was completely swollen with bites.
Here's yours truly with the sweetest fat little lump of baby Honeybee ever.
I'd like to say that they are this happy all the time! Perhaps inwardly!

Guilt No More Vacation

2009-07-09T23:26:00.002-05:00

We have a busload of pictures to post here, or on Picasa as that seems to be everyone's weapon of choice in this family, but since it's late I will simply scrawl here a few rules for GNoM vacationing.

1. When you are preparing to leave the house for six days, be sure to take out the garbage. But that bowl of leftover chicken stew? That one that you put in the microwave to heat up for an easy lunch before leaving? Go ahead and leave that there. Its unique odor met us at the door.

2. Make sure you bring lots of books, but don't expect anyone to read them. Honeybee will chew on them, though, so it won't be a complete waste of time and gas mileage.

3. When luxuriating in someone's beautiful lake, and you want to dip Honeybee into the refreshing water -- take off her regular diaper and replace it with a swim diaper. Then, throw the used diaper onto the beach, and forget that it is there, because later, just as you are about to send Truckster down to the dock to get some other item, A BEAR WILL BE PLAYING WITH THE USED DIAPER. Photos to follow.

4. Bring two pounds of bacon. Wimp out on cooking it because it takes too much cleanup. Bring two pounds of bacon home.

5. Wash that canvas tote bag before leaving, throw in dryer, and then go on vacation. Make sure the dry-erase marker is in it, so that your dryer can be full of ink upon your return. Don't forget this step, because otherwise your vacation will be like everyone else's.

6. Check for ticks. Tomorrow.

Summer legs

2009-07-03T13:52:00.003-05:00

I wanted to capture the bruises, dirt, scratches, and bug bites. My camera skills don't extend that far, unfortunately. Try to imagine, though.

Bike ride

2009-07-03T13:48:00.001-05:00

It's tiring!

Watch out for Fifi

2009-06-28T16:37:00.003-05:00

She's a pitcher!

New! New! New!

2009-06-28T16:23:00.003-05:00

Do you ever feel guilty because you know you should be line-drying your linens in the summer? Who hasn't looked out at the clothes line and thought to herself, "Gee, think of all the money we could save if only I were using that clothes line!" But you can't use clothes line because you have lost all the clothes pins!

Have we got a product for you.

The Guilt No More (TM) Clothes Line. The pins are already lost, so you can drape your sheets and dish towels right over in a very haphazard fashion and NOT FEEL BAD about it.

This new exciting product is the companion to our Guilt No More (TM) Clothes Dryer, which tumbles your wet laundry indefinitely but does not add any heat.

My family is currently testing a model of this one.

Best. Husband. Ever.

2009-06-23T14:17:00.003-05:00

Yes, Superguy is out right now with ALL SIX, count them, six (6) of our offspring, running errands, and I am at home in the refrigerated glory of our silent home.

I am making chocolate chip cookies, eating chocolate chips, blogging, doing laundry, and listening to talk radio. All at once. Multitasking.

Been reading a lot about the bad state of the world these last couple of days. But here in the domestic church presided over by Superguy, life is peaceful. He's about to be unemployed, and yet he is out with children, who love to just be with him, even if it is only a trip to the grocery store.

I'd live in a cardboard box on the side of the freeway with this man.

Guilt No More yard

2009-06-08T23:06:00.003-05:00

There are some people who have very messy lives. These people for some perverse reason seem to feel that the only way they can bear to go on living their messy lives is to tell perfect strangers about all the ways their lives are messy. (I think particularly of hairdressers who have given me the history of their romantic entanglements with men who are now in prison, as well as people at large parties who regaled me with detailed descriptions of their various methods of birth control, and how these methods did or did not work according to expectation.)

I too live a messy life, in a very real sense. Messy, that is, in that physical sense. This place, in other words, is a pit. Now, the only way I can bear to live in such a messy place is to remember that I am in the family business -- Guilt No More Products and Services, Inc. -- and my job is to model the merchandise. Having explained myself, let me relieve my mind by sharing with you the latest line in Guilt No More landscaping. "Urban Mud/Back to Basics" is what I'm thinking this product will be called when it goes on sale.

Take a look at this.

I mean, look at it. Could you possibly do ANYTHING to mess this up? It's perfect for people who frequently prefer their lawn mower to be stored upside down, in the mud, near the piles of plastic garbage that we call the Children's Outdoor Equipment.

Oh man.
See that white string half-buried? That's the clothesline.

Hmm. Somehow, I still don't feel better.

More on the Culture of Life

2009-06-03T10:18:00.004-05:00

My dear sister messybessy has written a lovely post on building the culture of life. How true, how right she is! We do have a lovely world, in so many ways. Even I, who am the pinnacle of anxiety and even pessimism, see and love the world God has blessed us with. And yet, I also have this current of pessimism coursing through me, a fear of all this goodness being taken away. The Culture of Life, I believe, banishes this pessimism and fear. It stands against the nihilism and hopelessness which attends our secular world and which creates the Culture of Death. Christ came to cast out fear, right? But it isn't just like falling off a log, espousing this Culture of Life. It isn't just a matter of saying, "I support life," and then fear is gone and we are all happy. I believe that as a Christian I must CHOOSE to build the Culture of Life every day, as messybessy has done. Supporting ours and other's families, hospitality, and prayer are all indeed necessary in this, and I love to read messybessy's encouragement on these. These are my additional (albeit mostly redundant) resolutions on this:

1) Build trust in the Love of the Lord, and surrender each day to Christ, trusting that he will make better use of it than I will. A Daily Offering would be appropriate here. Fear makes me want to be in control, but where does Life come from? God, not me. Did I make the beautiful flowers or the sunset? Did I design my darling daughter's blue eyes? No. The overabundance of Life, that Life that we are trying to build in this world comes from God and His Merciful Love, not from me. The best way to Build Life, or even build a life (my own) is in fact to turn it all over to Christ first thing. Didn't someone special once say that a man must give up his life in order to gain it? When I can turn over my own small life, and the life of my family to the Lord, then I have a starting place from which to build the COL. I think of the powerful image of the candles at Easter Vigil: if I turn in trust to the Lord, he will light my little candle with which I can in turn bring light to the world. In order to spread Life to the world, we have to have Life to begin with. Christ is the Way, the Truth, and the Life - we know where to turn.

2) After surrendering each day to the Lord, I have to gain and then hold onto a vision of what life I am trying to build and promote. Obviously, life in Christ is the goal here, but I think I need to hold onto a picture that is even more specific. I think messybessy's ideas about how to spend family time and how to be hospitable hit on this. I think of it in terms of my daughter. I want life for her, but more importantly I want a GOOD life for her. Again, prayer and a Christian life are the main substance of this life, but I need to keep in mind the smaller details as well. How can I create a life for her which is full of Light and beauty and goodness? If I have a vision of life that I work to build in my own home, then I can realize that vision and become a picture of life for others to witness; I can become a part of the COL. For me this vision includes affection, humor, cheerfullness, graditude, communication, hard work, good works, and of course love. Kind words, good use of my time, art and music, patience, education, and wholesome recreation are all things I need to pursue. And again, prayer first and foremost. If I try to realize this vision every day, I will be a sign to the world that life, a good life, is possible with Christ.

I think that is my main point: the world can indeed be a scary place, and seem very bleak. Fear is not living, it is hiding from life, and so the best way to overcome the fear that the world can build up (even if I am afraid too) is to counterattack by creating lives which are full of light and hope. Life and light need to be lived. I believe that this is my apostolate to the world in my vocation as a wife and mother. I hope that Christ can build my family to be full of love and light so that others might see us and know that REAL Life, rather than merely breathing and then dying, really is possible. In order to live this apostolate I need to turn to Christ first as the picture and origin of Life, then continually re-present that vision to myself, and then I need to work towards realizing it.

End of GNoM homeschool year

2009-05-28T14:12:00.002-05:00

Yes, you all in the Guilt No More Community may be wondering how we are winding down our laborious studies. Below, find proof of the grueling academic work these poor suffering children have been forced to endure.

Buster, brandishing his wand to give a kinetic demonstration of reading comprehension, using as his primary text "Harry Potter."

We use a dresser to keep track of all the different items for each child. Even though she is no longer (at this moment) homeschooled, Fifi's drawer gives perfect evidence of what she's been up to.

Here's Truckster, practicing gross motor skills and interpersonal communications, with Honeybee, who is learning spacial relationships.

And here we have Kewpie, during Sustained Silent Reading time, and Honeybee, working on her observational techniques.

It's been tough. But we're going to make it to tomorrow.

Building a culture of life

2009-05-24T21:19:00.004-05:00

I took a walk tonight and marveled at the beauty of dusk. Despite living right in the heart of the city, we are surrounded by natural beauty -- birds, animals, lovely flowers and trees, children, clear sky, water ... Gave thanks to the Lord and was once more struck by how contingent it all is. There is no earthly reason that He had to make creation beautiful. He made it beautiful just because, because He loves beauty just as we love beauty only with an infinitely greater, truer, holier love. And out of love, He could take it away from us, or allow us to destroy it.

So that got me thinking that we ought to work HARD to hold onto the gifts He has so gratuitously surrounded us with.

When I got home, I finished reading the perfect post from http://www.studeo.blogspot.com/ on building the culture of life. Since I don't know how to link, go to the blog and read the seven points. They are just excellent! And then started thinking, I would like to come up with some ways to build the culture of life. Smaller than the writer at Studeo, who really has defined some core concepts. But ways that I myself would like to work on being part of the solution.

1. Support new families with a lot of encouragement, prayer, and gifts. As Pope John Paul II of blessed memory said, "The future of humanity passes by way of the family." Every new family is a slap in the face of our enemy. He would love to ruin them all.

2. Be open to our own children, and be open to other people's. How stupidly simple in theory, but how difficult in practice. Children can be exhausting, and selfish people, like me, have a million ways to avoid them even when we are living with them (even when we are co-sleeping!). And we need to make sure we don't overextend our strength and end up with a nervous breakdown. But really, I can be more attentive, listen better, be more focused, than I sometimes (ok, often) am.

3.Hospitality, especially to the single. Good food that retains some semblance of being prepared by a person rather than a machine; a table that looks like it was set for someone special; conversation, music, storytelling, strolling, poetry-reciting and piano-playing by us for us.

4. Family time that involves no screens at all. (Yes, I'm kind of a Luddite on this one.) Family time in which we figure out how to enjoy life together without the Nuk of electronic amusement. There's a place for passive entertainment, but we're building the culture of life, here. Let's learn to crochet, or weed the garden, or paint our toenails together.

5. Gratitude for whatever we have and an instant and irrevocable rejection of envy or wistfulness for something else. This world has no experience of peace, none. Even as ridiculous a Christian as I am can offer the world His peace if I am willing to accept, as from His hand, whatever I have or do not have, whatever I gain or lose.

6. Get serious about prayer. Huge. Get really, really, really serious about spending time in the presence of our Blessed Savior. No excuses, no limp-wristed sighing. Good grief, the only one who can help us is right here! As a corollary, I am going to be more intentional about offering Mass for the culture of life.

I'd love to hear other ideas from the other three people who occasionally read this blog.

Family pilgrimage

2009-05-16T15:42:00.003-05:00

Since we all of us need all the help we can get, we have decided to do a family pilgrimage to the cathedral. Two other families will be joining us to walk down lovely Summit Avenue to the Cathedral of St. Paul -- an approved site for this Pauline Year.

We'll end at 10 a.m. Mass, then pray together the prayers for the intentions of the Holy Father, and then we' adjourn back here for ham, sweet rolls, fruit, and coffee.

I suggested that we carry palm branches and sing hymns as we walk, but the children gave me looks of horror. "It will be -- embarrassing!" said Buster.
"No way, I'm not singing," said Fifi.
"I will sing!" said Kewpie, who is always game for anything. At 3, you are mature enough to realize that winning the world for Christ may involve some -- embarrassment. So perhaps we can do one or two rounds of "Lift High the Cross."

And best, it is possible to gain a plenary indulgence! Of course, there is that small matter of being free of all attachment to sin. Yeah, just finishing up that little detachment. It's so lucky I'm almost done being attached to sin. I hope to be completely free of all attachment to sin after dinner.

We'll pray for all of our family in the diaspora.

What ho, family!

2009-05-16T15:29:00.002-05:00

Here is Sweetums' First Communion. Bless God.

We all have red, glinty eyes, but you get the general gist.

And this is the best: Buster in his altar serving surplice, Sweetums, and Fifi in her Schola robe. I'd like to get this framed. Just as soon as I figure out how to print photos.

Homeschool discovery

2009-05-04T15:26:00.003-05:00

We read a lot! No wonder the house is a disaster! Sheesh.

Get a load of this. This is a list that I kept the first year we "taught" the kids at home. Fifi was 7, Buster was 5, and everyone else was dang little.

The Book List -- completed (most read aloud)
Happy Birthday, Addie
Josefina Saves the Day
Dawn Treader
Understood Betsy
101 Dalmations
A Door in the Wall
Wind in the Willows
Prince Caspian
Beezus and Ramona
Anne of Green Gables
The Great Brain
The Great Brain Does it Again
The Great Brain at the Academy

Beautiful women

2009-05-04T14:06:00.003-05:00

OK, yes, the daughters are cute. But check out the truly beautiful one -- the woman who barely looks old enough to be a grandmother. The classiest, smartest, and all-around best lady I know.

When I think of this young woman, I think of her as being in fourth grade, wearing a school jumper, playing dolls. (Although, I don't think I was actually at home much when she was doing these things, since she is several -- OK many -- years younger than me.) But as we see here, she's confident, fun, and beautiful too.

This young woman is just about the embodiment of sweet temper. She deserves to be surrounded by green growing things her whole life. Reflective, generous, beautiful.

And below I would like to post -- but can't because I don't have a good picture of -- the other sister of mine, who would truly make this post complete.

This is the best family!

What we're up to these days

2009-05-03T14:07:00.002-05:00

Here is Buster's birthday party -- bowling and cupcakes.

Honeybee making the decision to drink responsibly, under adult supervision.

Kewpie's birthday. Can you even stand the cuteness?

Pinewood Derby racers.

Sweetums with her newest auntie, and a distracted brother, at the Como Conservatory.

We have far more photos to share. Here, though, is a list of news items.

1. Superguy has taken (it is devoutly to be hoped) his last law class EVER.

2. Sweetums made her First Holy Communion.

3. Truckster learned to ride a bike, without any help whatsoever.

4. Buster became an altar server.

5. Fifi will be in seventh grade this fall ------ insert dismay emoticon here!

Typical day, part 2

2009-02-18T14:16:00.002-06:00

Here is the second installment of What I DO All Day:

Then after reading, math, piano, and me nagging everyone to stay on track, it is almost lunch time. Buster disappears. He’s reading the Fellowship of the Ring, and steals every moment possible for it.
Kewpie follows me around, talking. Every time I go into the kitchen, she picks up the large plastic stepstool and sets it down right next to my feet, so that she can see what I am doing. This used to be charming when I had one child. Now it is maddening, since the bouncy seat for Honeybee is also in the kitchen and since when the dishwasher door is open there is exactly 3 square feet of space in which to walk. Remind myself that she is doing her job as toddler. Remember to kiss her and tell her she is a good helper. Turn on radio and ask her to go play. Sigh when she protests that she doesn’t want to go play. She is opening medicine bottles and pouring old milk from one dirty cup to another.
Make lunch. Eat lunch, while listening to Buster or Sweetums read the saint for the day.
After lunch debate the efficacy of homeschooling, get children going on after lunch chores. Sweetums is not yet done eating, so Truckster can’t clear the table. It’s not snowy, so Buster can’t shovel. I make him take out the garbage instead.
Baby is crowing and drooling, dance around, check e-mail. Kids run off. Since they are playing, debate just doing their jobs for them. Call them down, make them do their jobs.
Then comes the video time in which we argue about who gets to pick the video and how none of the videos are any good. I don’t blame them. They are completely in love with any glowing screen and frustrated when they can’t have the exact thing they want appear on it.
Honeybee goes to sleep again, and I sink onto couch, longing for a cup of coffee and a good book. Buster goes upstairs to finish lessons and I pull out meditations. Pray. Consider my sinfulness. Ponder possibilities of putting children in school next year. Deplore messiness of dresser-top and breakfast bar, resolve to clean them today.
After prayer, feel better. Run down and revolve the laundry, deplore messiness of the basement.

A typical day, part one

2009-02-15T15:04:00.004-06:00

Sometimes people wonder what I do all day. This is something I often wondered about when I only had one little baby and was considering homeschooling. So I thought it might be helpful for somebody out there to read about what our typical day looks like.

Provisos:

Every semester is different.

Because of the fluid nature of homeschooling and the many things that crop up with so many people under one roof, this day might occur four times in one week and then only once in the next. But it is fairly typical right now.

I will do this in installments, since the narrative is too long for one post.

Please, no one decide against homeschooling, having a large family, or getting married.

A Typical Day

6:30 a.m. Alarm goes off. Superguy wakes up Fifi.
7 a.m. After 45 minutes of nursing baby in bed, I get up with her – she’s too grunty and snorty to sleep with anymore.
Get up and bring Honeybee down. Change enormously yucky diaper and nurse her again.
Braid Fifi’s hair, make her lunch, yell at her for leaving parka at school. Kiss goodbye.
Sit down and nurse baby again, put her in car seat for morning nap.
Say morning offering.
Nuke leftover coffee and eat toast with peanut butter while reading current book.
Try to wake up children.
Get dressed and for once make bed. Feel good for a moment. Yell at children to get up.
Wash hair. Get Kewpie dressed.
Finally children are up, pour cereal and slice bananas, finish loading dishwasher. Take load of laundry down to the laundry room, fold a load, retumble damp stuff.
Noticing myself full of anxiety about the future and state of world for these children when adults, I go upstairs and pray earnestly. Feel better. Can only do so much.
9:05 a.m.
We begin homeschooling routine, starting with a morning offering before our messy family altar. Buster reads a prayer for priests, and Sweetums prays for Jesus to make our hearts like His.
Next, Buster practices the piano. Sweetums lingers over simple addition and subtraction, I give Truckster a reading lesson. Kewpie is wandering around talking.
The morning progresses, with a variety of lessons, phone calls, and requests for snacks, which I deny. Baby wakes up, requiring diaper change and nursing.
Then after reading, math, piano, and me nagging everyone to stay on track, it is almost lunch time. Buster disappears. He’s reading the Fellowship of the Ring, and steals every moment possible for it.
Kewpie follows me around, talking. Every time I go into the kitchen, she picks up the large plastic stepstool and sets it down right next to my feet, so that she can see what I am doing. This used to be charming when I had one child. Now it is maddening, since the bouncy seat for Honeybee is also in the kitchen and since when the dishwasher door is open there is exactly 3 square feet of space in which to walk. Remind myself that she is doing her job as toddler. Remember to kiss her and tell her she is a good helper. Turn on radio and ask her to go play. Sigh when she protests that she doesn’t want to go play. She is opening medicine bottles and pouring old milk from one dirty cup to another.Make lunch. Eat lunch, while listening to Buster or Sweetums read the saint for the day.

Large family cooking, or rather, large-family cooking

2009-02-13T21:20:00.003-06:00

Note the hyphen. Only one of us routinely cooks here in our large-family dwelling, and that would be yours truly.

Often I wish that I could find time to write the large-family cookbook, but one that did not require frozen breaded chicken patties (or patties of any kind, really), cream of mushroom/chicken/celery soup, refrigerated puff pastry, or industrial sized bags of frozen mixed vegetables ("vegetable medley").

However, being the mother of a large family, I don't have the time. It will be for some other crunchy Catholic mom to do it. When she's only got four at home and the oldest one does all the laundry, har har har.

Tonight I made Waffles for A Large Family, which is sort of like Music for Flag Day or Symphony for a Dead Princess; it's an undertaking and a very definite thing of its own. I post the recipe now, just as soon as I can waddle into the kitchen and get it, which gives me a chance to toss in those frozen gourmet onion rings that Superguy got me because he's the best ever.

This is the Joy of Cooking recipe, slightly adapted for those of us who refuse to separate eggs unless goaded, multiplied by three.

5 1/4 Cups flour

2 tablespoons baking powder

1 1/2 teaspoons salt

2 tablespoons sugar

9 eggs

6 tablespoons oil

4 1/2 cups milk

Yeah, melted butter would have tasted better. And yes, the eggs being separated would have added delectable lightness and airiness to the batter. But I'm not hauling out the old hand mixer just for Friday night dinner, no thank you very much.

Have I mentioned that we buy eggs four dozen at a time?

By the way, the photo is just for effect. That's not, obviously, what I used for the Waffles for a Large Family. I think this was a photo of a triple batch of Vindaloo. But I can't remember, since the lids are on. Let's just say it was Vindaloo.

A Fun Mommy Baby Day

2009-02-05T14:45:00.002-06:00

Today has been a fun day for Mommy AMills and her little Baby IsaMills. We had a very early morning, because we got to drop daddy off at work at 7:30. Mommy felt entitled to wear sweat pants and baby slept the whole way there, and Mommy got to chat with Daddy before he headed into work, which was nice. Then Mommy took Baby to the big bad Commissary, which actually turned out to be not so bad at all, since it wasn't even 8am yet. Baby slept like a champ in the carseat which was jammed into the cart, and Mommy was able to get the few things she needed with no problems! (On the way home, Mommy may or may not have purchased a tasty, yet horrible breakfast sandwich from the local fast-food drive thru, but that only makes Mommy feel bad about her self and a little queasy, so let's not mention it..) Once home, Mommy and Baby started to go for a walk, but found that even in Florida sometimes you really need mittens and a hat, which Mommy was without, so the walk was aborted quickly. That's ok though, because instead we got home and laid down for a morning nap. Mommy and Baby really know how to nap, so they snuggled side by side in bed, wrapped in covers, occasionallly nursing. Baby would stir and mommy would look down at the little sweet bundle snuggled up next to her, and usually just hugging Baby a little closer, or lightly patting or stroking her back would lull baby back into peaceful dreamland. Well, obviously with such a good deal, you like to get your money's worth, so Baby and Mommy took their "nap" until noon. After noon, baby had a change, and graciously only pooped through onto the very edge of her onesie, and so did not need a totally new outfit. After Baby played a little on her blankie on the floor and Mommy had a yummy leftover pork chop, which brutally scorched her mouth since all the knives were in the dishwasher and she basically speared the whole thing and ate bites right off, baby was tired and so Mommy decided that it was dancetime. Mommy scooped up baby, put on the cuban music cd, and Baby and Mommy "busted a moove" with all the best Latin dance styles. Baby was very very snuggly. Now Baby is lying in Mommy's lap and, in a rare mood, is not sleeping but not fussing, and just chilling in Mommy's lap, occasionally smiling up at Mommy, which is a new and delightful skill. In about an hour, Mommy and Baby will go pick up Daddy from work. Dinner may not be made, laundry may not be done, the rug may not be vacuumed, and Mommy may still be in sweats, but it sure has been a fun day!!

Words for the homeschooling mother, and others

2009-01-25T22:45:00.003-06:00

"The Beloved: My son, I am the Lord; no strength like his in the hour of distress (Nahum 1:7). when things are not going well with you, come to me. The chief hindrance to your receiving heavenly comfort is your slowness in turning to prayer; you do not come to me straightway and pray to me earnestly, but first you go seeking other things to comfort you, trying to find diversion in created things ....

"The trouble that now distresses you is my way of testing you; the fears which fill you with terror have no foundation. What use is it to worry about what the future will bring? It will only make you have sorrow upon sorrow. For today, today's troubles are enough (Matt 6:34). It is silly and useless to get worried or pleasantly excited about future events; quite likely they will never happen at all."

St. Thomas a Kempis, back when almost all schooling was homeschooling, and if you had six living children, you were unusually blessed. And if you had enough possessions to find it hard to keep them organized, you would be considered rich. And if you were weary with thinking about what to cook for your next meal that meant that you had food in the house, praise God.

Just keeping it real here.

Unbelievably cute? You decide

2009-01-21T20:18:00.002-06:00

Look at the vast expanse of baby tum!
Joseph, Mary, and "Baby Jesus" -- this was a play they worked on in the basement. I had nothing to do with it, which is why they are so sweet!

Sorry --- fuzzy picture, but imagine that we're all travelling 500 miles an hour.

I'll bet you thought they never learned anything

2009-01-18T22:07:00.003-06:00

Many people may be wondering: If you just had a new baby, and you felt so lousy and immobilized that you did basically nothing but complain, how is that you are "home schooling"? And what are they actually learning? Well, here is proof of something, anyway:

Here is Sweetums with her poster on the loon, which she did an oral report on for our homeschool co-op. She did all the work, trust me. However, I did manage to find the loon coloring page.

Truckster did his oral report -- and he is FIVE -- an oral report, I tell you -- on the Dakotas. He told me all the facts, and I handwrote them out on the white paper. He did the pasting of the various elements, and while he was doing his report I was not allowed to even help him hold the poster. His deal. Very proud.

We also, this fall, went to Mankato MN to visit the real life houses where Betsy and Tacy lived. Can you even believe this? It looks just like the Lois Lenski drawing! it was awesome!

Here is where Maud Hart Lovelace lived.

And here is where her friend "Bick" lived. Can't remember her real name. It is now a little gift-shop slash museum. We had a chance to see the armchair her dad sat in.

And here we are on the bench at the foot of the Hill Street Hill. It isn't the original, but in every other respect is much like we pictured. What a great day! We talked and talked about the books and how things change.

Of course, Fifi still can't spell very well, and Sweetums is just barely able to subtract 8 from 12.

Still.

Our new dog!

2009-01-08T20:51:00.007-06:00

Well, since all the cool people (at least, those not living in MS, MA, or IA) have dogs, we followed suit and obtained Casper, the Bassett Hound. I know, I know, what are we doing with a dog, when we have such a stuffed house and it's too cold to walk him properly, especially since he has such short legs... This is a particular breed however -- one could even say the Guilt No More breed, since this type of Bassett Hound is invisible. And also doesn't smell. Much. Although from now on, whenever I smell something I don't like, i will know it is Casper.

Here he is on our bed.

Bad dog, Casper! Put down the ketchup.

Not the whipped cream too, Casper?

Here he is, guarding Honeybee. She's still a little shy around him.

I'm sure you all will want to meet him. More photos next time. I know you all are envious.

Finally, what you all were waiting for!

2009-01-07T20:57:00.002-06:00

Hello to all our friends in the Diaspora, from the Land of Origin! We had experienced a slight mental difficulty relating to Messy Bessy's sleep deprived inability to navigate simple internet tasks. However, now that all seems to have been sorted out, internet-wise, although not sleep wise, we will proceed with some pictures. Below, behold this year's Christmas tree.
The children wanted me to take their picture with this particular arrangement.

A very handsome Truckster with Honeybee, who has filled out nicely and looks -- a little, wouldn't you say? -- like her daddy.

Here's Kewpie with Honeybee.

Ah, yes, and now to Halloween. We are the family that never allows our children to do anything FUN for this nasty holiday, but require them to maintain some semblance of a religious theme for their costumes. Thus, from left to right, Bernadette of Loures, St. Rose of Lima, a sweet angel, St. George, and Father Brown. (His was my favorite costume this year.)

Honeybee went as a fat baby, and I stayed at home and ate candy until I was reminded that gluttony is not a deadly sin for nothing.

That ever continuous struggle between Darkness and Light...

2008-11-21T13:40:00.002-06:00

Things preggo wants to get done today:
-All dishes clean and put away
-Make apple dessert (use up not so delicious apples)
-Make nice dinner for husband
-Vacuum living room
-Finish loads of laundry
-Look nice with nice hair and makeup
-Make bed
-Knit squares for baby blanket
-clean off dining room table, set nicely
-read Womanly Art of Breastfeeding
-go for walk outside
Things preggo has done today:
-written emails
-written blog post
-eaten too many chips
Things preggo remembers in the GNoM world:
-eating too many chips can be countered by NOT eating Little Debbie snack cake later
-writing emails is a good and necessary thing for preggos who live far from family and friends
-tomorrow is Saturday and hubster will be home all day and can be easily dragooned into helping with cleaning
-preggo is preggo, which is usually a somewhat viable excuse for not getting things done
-it is only 2pm, probably if preggo just hops in the shower now, she can magically wash away all her lazy tendencies and conquer her to-do list with impunity!!! Go preggo, charge forward in the fight for a Light and Lovely home - you can do it!!!

... and if not, there is always tomorrow, right?

Guilt no more housework

2008-10-20T18:14:00.002-05:00

Here are a few things that the children can do so that you can eat bon-bons:

sweep
fold napkins
read to the toddler
unload the dishwasher
pick up books off floor
fetch and carry
answer the phone
wipe the table

Here are a few things you shouldn't stress about:
everything else the kids didn't know how to do

Autumn in the Land of Origin

2008-10-12T17:08:00.003-05:00

Just thought that you guys from other barbarian lands might want a few more pictures from the Land of Origin. Below, you see Honeybee with Superguy. Messy Bessy on the messy porch with little sweet Honeybee.
Gorgeous maple trees as seen from messy porch.
Not a great shot, but the front yard with pretty trees behind it.
And is this a country lane? Will Jane Austen characters come traipsing daintily down it, swinging their little parasols and talking in elevated language about noble love, duty, and virtuous living? Or is it, rather, a dirty filthy unpaved alley that the city has never paved once in the whole of its existence and will not do now unless we and our neighbors agree to a special levy on our properties? Well, whichever, it's still nice to look at, from afar, and right at this time.

Remember, the Land of Origin: It's more than just mosquitoes, high taxes, road construction, and Obama posters in every yard!

Welcome, Honeybee, to GNoM!

2008-10-06T17:14:00.004-05:00

As you all probably know by now, we have a new Guilt No More Community member, whom we shall call Honeybee, on account of being so dang sweet! Here are the cute pics of the other kids and Superguy modeling possibly the cutest baby ever!

I couldn't fit all the individual pictures in one post, so scroll down for more.

We are so happy!

God is good!

2008-10-06T17:09:00.001-05:00

Why it is nine rather than eight

2008-09-24T21:26:00.002-05:00

God knew, when he was working out the logistics for human life (not that it took him all that long), how -- ahem -- challenging childbirth could be for Eve after the fall. And so, as he does with all things, he gave her a little silver lining.

That lining being, that he increased the time of human gestation by ONE MONTH. Originally, I am convinced, human gestation was to have been eight joy-filled and increasingly thrilling months, but after the whole apple thing Eve was not going to get off all that easily. The pain of childbirth becoming a real issue (whereas before human birth was actually kind of like a really long and relaxing massage), God decided to increase ordinary pregnancy to nine months. This gift makes up for the -- ahem -- challenge of childbirth because God knows that being pregnant that last month is SO INCREDIBLY TIRESOME that anyone at all would prefer the pain to any more pregnancy.

Just thought all five of my readers would want to know.

New website ideas for the GNoM Community

2008-09-23T15:32:00.003-05:00

As is generally known, Messy Bessy does not have, nor does she plan to acquire, much web knowledge. And even the Blogger guidance site, which is probably written at a level that would allow Sweetums to move forward technologically speaking, has not been overly clear as to how I would add a favorite website sidebar. (As soon as Superguy has some free time and can bear to answer my ridiculous questions, I'll ask him.)

Thus, I am just going to type the addresses in here and you all can go look on your lunch hour. These are sites that I find interesting, enlightening, or just fun to look at.

First, a modesty website, from our orthodox Jewish friends: www.tznius.com, which has so many really cool headscarves. If I could get away with it, I'd totally do the headscarf thing, since that would be the answer to genetically dumb hair.

Next, www.houseartjournal.com, which is a Catholic mother who occasionally takes really gorgeous photos of ordinary things.

My source of wry Catholic commentary on politics and culture is www.markshea.blogspot.com, as it also is for really funny YouTube selections.

For those who are able to stomach a little bit of crudity with their humor, you should check out www.junecleaverafterasix-pack.blogspot.com, an especially good one for military wives.

And finally, our very own www.martinpease.blogspot.com -- a lovely blog by a great person!

Apple picking today

2008-09-20T09:07:00.002-05:00

One of the many many reasons I married Superguy is that he is totally into the idea of family togetherness. As many in the Guilt No More Community at large know, the general term for family togetherness when outside the four walls of one's (incredibly disorderly) house is FFO: Fun Family Outing. And Superguy not only buys the concept, he really comes up with the best ideas for FFO's.

However, one thing I am happy to contribute to this marriage is the longstanding tradition of apple-picking as an FFO. For years now, we have gone to some sort of orchard each fall, and stocked up on apples that taste like apples, pumpkins that have personality, and generally an assortment of jars filled with honey, jam, salsa, etc. not made in Chinese sweatshops.

The kids are filled with glee. I am slightly apprehensive (underneath the glee) because there are not that many more days before I am due to have this latest little baby, and would not like to go into labor whilst picking apples in a faraway section of orchard far to the west of the hospital. However, I've never been a quick labor gal, and at this point it might be preferable to just stimulate labor even at the expense of an FFO.

Will report after our trip!

Guilt no more Indian summer

2008-09-16T18:47:00.002-05:00

We here in the Land of Origin have been having Indian summer, and here is a little sample of what we have been doing: The pretend library you see below provided more than an hour of quiet occupation, which is worth really really a lot to some of us. When in doubt about your fashion options on Possibly The Most Beautiful Day of September, go with the cowboy hat/diaper ensemble.
The future Cy Young winner, practicing. We knew him when.

Please, all of you from Squeaky Clean Manicured Lawn Fabulous Chandelier-Containing House Land, note the existence of the Guilt No More yard: Mainly mud, but with the mandatory plastic chair, jumbled toys, and embarrassing dirty wading pool. We ordered it special, and as with all Guilt No More products, this lawn has given satisfaction. No matter what the children decide to play, including paleontology, motocross, rugby, or Pa Ingalls Digs a Well, this lawn provides a pleasing cover.

The house next door is still for sale! Who wants to be neighbors????

Iowa

2008-09-03T19:48:00.003-05:00

Where John Wayne was born. The kids wondered who he was. I guess Netflix will help.
A medieval tower, strategically positioned on a hill in rural Iowa.
A birthday in progress in beautiful Iowa corn palace.
Superguy, taunted sufficiently into this rare smile.

We had fun! Thanks, Martin and Carolyn!

Five

2008-09-03T19:38:00.004-05:00

Can you believe this boy is five? It doesn't seem possible.
The five-year-old cousins are soaking up the rays of Iowan sun. When asked, they said, "We're having a slice of the good life!" (They really did say that.)
Birthday boys.

If I could, I would see to it that the happy innocence of this age stayed with them always. It's so beautiful to see.

Five to go

2008-08-26T18:49:00.002-05:00

We're at thirty-five weeks of pregnancy here. I am at the "wow am I going to actually get any bigger?" stage, soon to move into the "dear lord please let it be today" stage. Which will be followed by "I can't stand it where's the acupuncturist - heck where's the voodoo lady -- anything is better than one more day of pregnancy."

God's designs are always so effective, I think. The worse the end of pregnancy, the happier you will be when you're in the middle of steamroller-sized contractions.

And for those who require the gory details, our little Gilbert/a is head-down and apparently the exact right size for how old he/she is.

Anyone have name suggestions for us?

A new member of the Guilt No More Community (TM)

2008-08-22T14:15:00.003-05:00

Gabby and Joe with Madeline Mary, all of them looking impossibly young and sweet. Especially Madeline...
A beautiful grandmother with a tiny baby who will, no doubt, contribute much to this blog.
New mama, new baby.
You already saw this one, but I couldn't resist posting it.
OK, I'm a tech toddler, so I didn't know how to turn this around. But tilt your head to the left and feast your eyes -- the quintessential daddy pic.

the size of an infant's stomach...

2008-08-21T17:49:00.006-05:00

Although I fully realize that I am preaching to the choir, here are a few notes of amazement from a newly minted father:

My child crash landed into the great commonwealth of Massachusetts a mere 7lbs. 2.9 oz. When one factors in the amount of fluid in her lungs, meconium and various other artifacts of the "in womb" state she was really around 6 lbs. 15 oz. pure certified Madeline M. Doran weight. Which brings me to my point.

According to the laws of physics, mass is conserved. Therefore how is it possible for a 6 lbs 15 oz beautiful and little human being to a) continuously eat 17 hours a day and b) on her first day in the house, before she had even had a full meal from mama, destroy her onesie, nightgown, recieving blanket and blast certain portions of daddy's arm with a gigantic BM. If mass is conserved, how is such a terrific mass a) stored and b) expended? Simply umbelievable.

What are parents doing?

2008-08-14T10:16:00.002-05:00

So, Superguy has a thing for the FoxNews website. I would link to it, but I don't know how. Anyway, as it was just sitting on the computer screen, I read an article about "special needs" twin sisters who have gone missing. The headline was horrifying -- twin girls, both gone? I pictured three year olds in pink frilly dresses and an estranged relative who had decided to simply take them off so he/she could be in charge of the little sweeties...

But no. These girls are 16, and the picture shows them to be beautiful and ordinarily dressed teens; their father describes them as "mentally slow" and that they both still play with dolls but want to "meet boys."

It turns out they have been using their computer(s?) a lot lately. The father was unaware that they had seven MySpace sites -- he thought they were using the computer for homework.

Then it also turns out that they have "run away" before, but had always been back within a day. But on the day they went missing, they went out near the road, clearly hanging around, waiting for someone. Sure enough, someone drove up, the girls got into the car, and that was the last anyone has seen of them.

There are SO MANY THINGS wrong with this situation, even aside from the fact that vulnerable young women have disappeared. Here are my questions:

1. These girls are mentally slow, so much so that they were in the special program at their high school, yet their relatives were not at all alert to their frightening habit of "running away"? When they went out toward the road and stood there, looking for somebody apparently, why didn't someone go out and ask them what in the world they were doing? Why didn't someone make them wait in the house, and tell them their "ride" could just jolly well come on in and meet the parents?

2. Since when could young women with mental challenges be expected to be safe on the Internet? Having an Internet connection is like having a miniature Mall of America right in your own home, except without the security guards. Anyone could be there, anyone could persuade a vulnerable youth to reveal information she shouldn't.

3. What are parents today thinking? How trustworthy is our culture? Every other magazine, billboard, and pop song reveals our cultural attitude toward young girls. They are to be sexually desired, displayed, egged on toward immodesty and lack of restraint, given "freedom." In other words, young women are basically beautiful animals, to be cultivated for the purposes of the use and pleasure of others. They are to be taught that this is normal and that they will enjoy it a lot -- after all, look at all the young beautiful female rock stars and movie actresses and how much they end up enjoying what they become (B. Spears, the Olsen twins, etc etc etc). Parents who attempt to take their teenage girls out of this altogether deserve, according to popular thinking, the scorn and contempt of almost everybody but definitely of the girls, who are to have the "freedom" to go out and suck up the poison and lick their lips while they do.

So many times when I get into conversations about this topic, I invariably hear from people that "you can't make a girl live in a bubble" and that "you can't protect them from everything." That's true. And certainly even mentally challenged girls have free will and consciences, to the degree that they have understanding. But let's just put it this way -- my children aren't going to face the culture without their parents right by their side. We are not going to just put them on the rowboat and wave goodbye while the sharks swarm around, just because that's what somebody who has written a book says is best. When, God willing, my girls (and boys) are teens, they are going to have to work a hell of a lot harder than these missing young women did to get that "free."

And quite frankly, I don't care if it makes them despise me for a while. My children aren't animals. They aren't objects. They are enfleshed souls -- shining, awe-inspiring, immortal, and deserving only the purest and highest that we can offer them. I won't allow someone to hand them a snake when they're asking for bread. And if, as children, they reach for the snake, I am going to grab their hands and hold them, really tightly if necessary.

Summer

2008-08-12T21:47:00.003-05:00

For those of you in the Diaspora, I offer these photos to keep you updated on life here in the Land of Origin.

I would post a Guilt No More photo of my kitchen in its current state, but no one needs that sort of discouragement.

Guilt no more childbirth

2008-08-09T13:53:00.003-05:00

In honor of youngest sister Gabs, who is due to have her first baby ("Shim" thus far) any day now, I post the following items for having a guilt-no-more childbirth experience.

1. There is no reason to make life more difficult than it has to be. THINK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE for as many of your waking hours as possible. Here are some possible topics: the pathetic nature of the Olympics today; US foreign policy in regard to North Korea; the cider vinegar-as-health-supplement debate; interesting wallpaper ideas for the bedroom; the unusual linguistic patterns of that one region of Africa where they click; whether and to what extent classical music is a thing of the past.

2. You will know they are real contractions, just as you know for sure when you sneeze. There's really no mistaking the sensation, after a certain point.

3. Eat, Mama, eat. Get those energy drinks and have them cold, so that during early labor you can keep up your strength even if your stomach is saying, "No way! No way! Major bodily disruption occurring! No time to digest!"

4. Do not pack your hospital bag until your due date. If you go into labor early, there is nothing that you would really lack, not living five hours from the hospital and having a husband who will be more than happy to run home to get you your special bathrobe. However, if you should not have been delivered of your child BY that date, it will be TORTURE to sit there looking at it as it lurks smugly in the corner, taunting your increasingly impossible physical condition.

5. What to pack: a toothbrush and toothpaste. Very very very important. Also, one really cute unisex outfit for the baby. Also, your favorite cute maternity outfit that you can wear home -- choose something almost dressy. You want to feel human as you go out in public. And finally, many and various fun, light, pretty magazines. Nix to Catholic World Report, First Things, the Economist, or anything relating to politics or world events. Think Country Living, Faith and Family, Real Simple, etc. Oh, and the car seat.

6. What not to pack: four shirts, two skirts, six pairs of socks, games, videos, writing paper, receiving blankets or diapers (the hospital has these), a laptop, curling iron, stuffed animals, etc. The books might say that these are helpful. In reality, by the time you need to be in the hospital, none of this stuff is going to be helpful.

7. Your poor husband. Give him permission to eat junk food throughout the entire hospital stay, since that is what will probably be most comforting and easy for him. Do not require him to eat fruit. Don't yell at him -- he's more scared of this than you are. Also, give him things to do -- fetching ice water, calling relatives, making the hospital staff be PERFECTLY SILENT during your hardest contractions.

8. Childbirth is not meant to be done all at once. If you start to feel overwhelmed, remember that you only have to get through each moment on an individual basis. Do NOT start asking yourself, "If it's this hard now, how hard will it be when yada yada yada..." God will give you the grace to meet each contraction and each push with the strength it requires. And if there are unforeseen complications, realize that He will guide you through them as well.

9. The ordinary healthy woman, in a low risk healthy childbirth situation, can give birth completely without fear. If something weird or unusual should arise, that is why you are in the hospital with trained staff. Trust that your body can do this.

10. You know that saying, "the light at the end of the tunnel"? Well, at the end of this particular tunnel, there is A BABY! And he or she will be a creation unlike any other! So if the unforeseen does occur, you can remember it was just that particular tunnel, and the important part of the journey is the BABY!

11. Nurses are human beings too; let them help you, but don't let their faults depress you. Here are some things nurses are experts on: labor aids, postpartum care, dosing medicine, checking vitals, caring for your comfort and safety, monitoring your progress. Here are some things that nurses are not NECESSARILY experts on: breastfeeding frequency, childrearing, sleep styles, infant calming techniques, US foreign policy in relation to North Korea.

12. Childbirth is exhausting, and not only for you. You may be surprised to see your husband as haggard and incoherent as he may be; although you are the one who went through the delivery from the front lines so to speak, he was your key support staffer, and a large part of his suffering was that he could not do nearly enough to shoulder yours for you. Also, he has just met his first child. He is a father now. That very fact can make a man want to sleep for twenty-four hours straight, just as soon as he has had a good two-three beers.

Living the cliche

2008-08-06T13:21:00.004-05:00

Yes indeed. Barefoot, in the kitchen, pregnant.

God is so good to me!

Now if only I could live the one that goes "Early to bed, early to rise ..."

(And yes, I was in fact frying chicken and boiling corn. Can I be real?)

This is not my life!

2008-08-01T17:20:00.003-05:00

As you will see from the pictures, I am an organized person. I have a laundry room with a folding counter (being used for folding), shelves that contain various laundry/storage things, clean and working machines, bright light, and bare clean tile on the floor. Furthermore, I have three huge sorting bins, which handle all the ordinary laundry of one day in our household of seven (soon to be eight). If I do one-two loads a day, and have the children carry their folded piles up and put them away once every day (usually after lunch or dinner), my machines never runneth over and my heart sings with joy.

However, be it noted that this is all totally new for me -- and this after eleven plus years of motherhood, almost thirteen of marriage. This same laundry room, just a few weeks ago, more closely resembled one of those garbage houses that they find after some batty old lady dies. I don't even want to post a picture. Just think the exact opposite of the photos here, and you get the idea.

The credit for my changed life laundrywise goes completely to my fearless and loving sister AR who does not, apparently, have enough to do with the four children (toddler twins amongst them) and who has at least fourteen extra calories that have somehow not yet been burned.

Thanks, sis! I can hold my head up once again!

Can you believe it?

2008-07-27T16:04:00.002-05:00

How could these children be old enough to play real ball? where has the time gone? When Fifi was three she was three for about five years -- we went for looooooong walks, and spent endless time reading story books, and then she was suddenly this Amazon.

And Buster -- look at him. He actually looks like somebody else's kid, pitching a real ball in some foreign game that I happen to see as I sit at a picnic table eating take-out Thai food with my new husband. Not actually my son, whose uniform I washed and who learned how to pitch without my help whatsoever. (Of course, his father gave him some pointers ...)

I can't get over it. Gotta keep on having children, or they are all going to turn monstrously huge like this and I'll have to resort to those pathetic life-like dolls that have a little battery operated heartbeat and synthetic skin, and real eyelashes. Much better to just keep on having real ones who still throw easy ones that I can catch.

A blog I just found

2008-07-16T14:31:00.003-05:00

Since I am still technologically a toddler, I do not know how to link to a website other than just typing out the address of it. Maybe Superguy can show me how, and then I will graduate to technology preschool. (I wonder if there is something the equivalent of learning to hold the scissors properly, except for computers?)

Anyway, in my quest to learn more about the fine art of cooking, housekeeping, and generally being a post- postmodern woman, I came across this neat blog, www.thepioneerwoman.com

What caught my eye is the recipes. All women's blogs contain recipes, except maybe for women who can't stand cooking, in which case I haven't run across them. She shows you with beautiful color photos exactly what she does for each step of the recipe, and the results look delicious.

Plus, her story is too too impossibly romantic. You'll have to read it, AMM.

The day of rest

2008-07-06T14:18:00.003-05:00

Can we find a lovelier example of Sunday rest? This truly was not posed -- they were all asleep.

(And the large circular blue thing is the top of a punching bag. Why it was there? don't know.)

Bread -- for a real family

2008-07-03T16:44:00.003-05:00

We love homemade bread, and I love to make it. So today, being such a mild summer day, proved the perfect chance to try a recipe called "Batch Bread." It is recommended for a large family, a small restaurant, or a boarding house! I feel that we qualify. Note that the dough -- which weighed more than five pounds, which I know because I added an entire five-pound bag of flour and then some) -- did its main rising in my Ginormous Family Dutch Oven ("heavy enough to kill an intruder!").

Updates will appear on the quality of the bread. For now, Messy Bessy is basking in the Ma Ingalls moment.

Guilt No More Front Porch, Springtime

2008-06-28T22:29:00.002-05:00

Superguy pointed out that this is the epitome of white trash front-porch living. Note the plywood across what had been a beautiful plate-glass window. Note the beer, and the peanuts being stored in a recycled bread bag!

The house next door is for sale. Who wants to be neighbors?

Thoughts about my Alma Mater

2008-06-27T11:45:00.000-05:00

I have been, since high school, on a "Quote of the Day" e-mailing list from a former teacher. I occasionally read over these quotes, although I don't bother too much about them generally. Today's quote included a postscript from the teacher, noting that he had posted a little essay about the recent Trinity school commencement address on his blog. Interested, in a very slight way, in the happenings of my alma mater, I clicked on the link and read the blog post. It is hard to express my feelings upon reading this post. There was somehow a curious admixture of nostalgic fondness for the good-hearted intellectualism that was fostered at Trinity, as well as irritation and, probably undeserved, scorn for the pretensions of the Trinity Academic. It wasn't so much the substance of the post - I had not heard the Commencement address and so could not really form an opinion - as the, oh, dreaminess of that post and those surrounding it. (I may also be biased by the generally "dreamy" nature of the quotes I receive.) And it isn't just this teacher or this blog. I tend to have this sort of reaction to all things "Trinity". It seems unfair; for the most part, I loved my teachers and my classes and was completely blessed to have a happy, healthy, high-school experience. But, I guess I feel like I have grown up since then. There was something in the air at Trinity that now seems a little to 'rarified'. It isn't the intellectual side of the school; I certainly don't think they are too intellectually snobbish. It isn't the counter-cultural social environment, which I think is probably the best thing going for the school. I think what galls me about the Trinity school philosophy of life is the air of privileged idealism. I wholeheartedly believe in the pursuit of Truth, Beauty, and Goodness, but these things ought to be pursued in the real world, with a sense of perspective and real work and, please, a sense of humor! The Trinity idealism favors philosophy, not history; art, not science (at least not science in its actual workings); poetry, not prose. There is a sense of how important everything is, while missing how funny things can be. I don't know, I feel like I am rambling. I may be wrong and unfair, and maybe I have simply been corrupted by the secular world. But, all I can say is that what I love about the Catholic Church and the Catholic method of pursuing T,B, and G (and what I think is missing in the Trinity idealist philosophy) is that a person can become a saint through obedience. A man doesn't need to study the world to love it and to serve God, he can merely work hard, observe, and be thankful. We can bumble our way through life, and still, relying on God's Mercy!, end up in real, good happiness. I think perhaps some simplicity and humility is lost in the Trinity academic worldview.
Just a thought.

Baby update

2008-06-25T21:50:00.002-05:00

Went to the midwife (aka "the coven") and found that our baby is just about perfect. I, on the other hand, am working to give a very good impression of a three-pack-a-day smoker, what with the hacking cough and the slow trudge. Luckily I'm still a few years away from the nasty yellow leathery skin, although I have a brother who is a lot closer to that than I am.

Hard as it is for people pregnant for the first time to comprehend, the length of human gestation is not very long, really. Here it seems we just found out about little "Gilberta" as Superguy likes to call him/her, and now this little miracle of God has a perfect heart, fingers, toes, bladder, kidneys, eyes and ears and every single thing. Slightly bigger than a box of butter.

Each time is more amazing to contemplate -- like trying to imagine a new color, one that no one has ever yet seen. That's what it is to think about who this new little person will be.

So we're just really grateful!

Life around here

2008-06-06T17:47:00.003-05:00

IN the interests of keeping the Guilt No More Community fully informed about life in their Land of Origin, I post the following offerings.

This is what happens when Sweetums gets a make-up kit for her birthday.
You know you have a big family when your Dutch oven stretches out farther than your conventional burner. This was my mother's day present, and it can hold enough lentil soup to feed an entire Somali family. Or ours.
Fifi made raisin bread. This lasted less than two hours.
A tornado? High winds? Or incredibly slobby girl children who take after me?
Beware. Warriors live here.

Reflections on Sisyphus

2008-05-30T09:14:00.003-05:00

Remember that guy who was condemned to roll a gigantic rock up a huge mountain? And how JUST as he reached the top, the rock got too much for him, and it slipped and rolled right down to the very bottom? And since this was his eternal punishment, he had to go right down to the bottom and start pushing again? Knowing what would happen at the top?

I feel this is a very good image of the housewife's battle against laundry.

Yesterday I went to a function at Fifi's school and met a mom of four little ones. We talked briefly about where we lived, the names and ages of our children, and the weather. Then, point blank, she asked, "How do you keep up with the laundry?"

It is the big question. There have been huge blog threads with hundreds of posts, devoted solely to how to keep up with the laundry. It's almost as if we are all diabetics, or amputees, or afflicted with the same odd compulsion -- which we are; in this case, how to keep the socks from disappearing into dirty sock land, how to keep up with the sheets before they form their own rock band, how to make sure the person who has to actually be wearing a full set of (clean) clothes to work can do this reliably.

My answer: Just keep rolling the rock, sister. Roll a little every day. You'll know you're at the top of the hill when you are so tired of matching socks that you need a double whiskey before you even touch the sock basket. You'll know you're at the bottom of the hill when you wake up one morning and Sweetums is wearing the toddler's leggings and Truckster's only option for a clean t-shirt is to turn the current one inside out.

The only other thing I can think of is going all counter-cultural and just having the frontier wardrobe: The church dress, the school dress, and the play dress. Wash once a week.

Guilt no more Dining

2008-04-29T19:47:00.004-05:00

Fifi has sweet n sour "chicken" with an "egg roll."
Buster has barbeque "pork." Yum.
Sweetums has "turkey n gravy", while Truckster will "enjoy" Salisbury "steak."
Superguy has "Chicken Fried 'Pork' " (TM)

Messy Bessy is happy. No dishes!

Of course, it's all completely disgusting. But quick! Guilt no more! You too can be this happy.

Some thoughts about this state

2008-04-27T19:30:00.002-05:00

We were JUST about to put away the boots, hats, scarves, and snowpants, when the rain/snowstorm hit two days ago. Previous to that it had been almost 80 degrees, the kids were begging to go outside barefoot, and the sunshine actually felt hot, as opposed to that wan kind in which there is a desperate desire to be warm while disappointing (sort of like Hillary Clinton).

Today we walked around Como Lake, seeing many different interesting dogs, as well as interesting birds, although the people were mostly like us -- wearing hats and gloves, smiling but with red noses.

We are getting a LITTLE BIT GRUMPY. Especially those of us trapped inside a house with frightening large children and not enough tranquilizer darts to go around. I may just use these remaining ones on myself...

Patriots Day

2008-04-21T21:12:00.004-05:00

In the great state of Massachusetts, Patriots Day is taken a little more seriously. Today is officially Patriots Day, and the kids have school off and the postmen do not deliver the mail in observation of this great momentous day. Additionally, the men of our fair city of Lexington invest greatly (although, what don't they invest greatly in?) in period costumes of the British Redcoats, colonists (even a few Tories mixed in with the larger bunch), and of course the Royal Irish Artillery (who shoot giant cannons). These gentlemen engage in not just one, but several different battles along the famous Battle Road over the course of the weekend and it is quite remarkable. These guys are not kidding around with their revolutionary war history and neither are the folks in the crowd (I saw a nice couple get in a cussing match with a couple of liberal "Harvard types" because they told their 4 year old son that the red coats were the "bad guys" apparently Harvard hates Bush so much they blame him even for the revolutionary war, which was also for oil). Bad liberal types aside, the spectacle was quite enjoyable.

Some Photos to Make The Rest of You Feel Better

2008-04-18T18:45:00.004-05:00

We have a system. It's called Stack It on the Desk.

Yes, they are cute. Now.

And this was only lunchtime.

Some of us obsess just a LITTLE too much about food....

2008-04-09T16:45:00.002-05:00

OK> So today I spent literally 5 of the 8 hours of my work day looking at food blogs on the Internet. The bosses were all out of the office for most of the day and I had gotten pretty much all my work done (ok, so there is still a massive pile of papers to be shred, but I can't really leave the office when I'm the only one there!), so I had some free time on my hands. I don't even recall now how I hit upon this first food blog, SmittenKitchen, this morning (it's as if it was handed down to me from on high, as the perfect "Pease" woman time-waster!) but wow. It is just pages and pages of little articles with recipes and beautiful, glossy pictures! The first recipe on the page was a gorgeous glamour shot of a lemon blueberry bread. Scroll down, and you see pictures of the ingredients heaped in the bow, and then the beaters stirring them... I know I know, this is terrible and my more prudent and moderate and... less food obsessed female kin and mother (is a mother your kin?) will surely scorn the very notion, as well as the flagrant glamorization of something that they do very often and very well, but without the glossy photos. But, on a (formerly) grey day when you are cooped at your desk, and you know for a fact that you forgot to bake the potatoes you were going to use for tonight's dinner last night, and that you won't be home to your small kitchen to start anything until at least 6;30.... well what a nice escape! Look! If I could have a day off, and I could have some brilliantly sunny and bright kitchen filled with top quality ingredient, I too could turn out these glorious foods! Or maybe it's the other way around - if I could spend time making these recipes, I too would have the beautiful sun-kissed kitchen and top quality ingredients/kitchen tools that she seems to have! But, lest we think that the first food bloggress was some sort of minor food deity, let me correct you - no! She even has a whole archive section devoted to FAILED recipes! Well, that was what sealed the deal. I bookmarked the site, and here is the link for you all to enjoy: http://smittenkitchen.com/
And then, when I had "wasted" about 3.5 hours on that site, I innocently clicked on one (or about 14) of the links the site had, and I stepped out into the wide world of food blogs...

All in all, it was a pretty nice afternoon, although I had to be indoors... and now I feel hungry...

You didn't believe me

2008-04-07T19:24:00.002-05:00

The inside isn't much better.

The neighbors must be thrilled!

Guilt no more lawn: we chose the "garbage dump" option when we ordered.

Guilt no more home, part uhnh

2008-04-06T21:03:00.002-05:00

Mud.

There are few words to describe the back and side yards of the humble abode of Superguy, Messy Bessy, and their five growing children (Fifi, Champ, Sweetums, Truckster, and Kewpie).

The grass, which came to us five years ago already well on its way to becoming a guilt-no-more lawn, barely held on throughout last summer, and then received what just might have been its death warrant when we decided to park cars on it for the State Fair last August.

When the unseasonable, unreasonable and totally undeserved six inches of heavy wet snow we received on April 1 ("Fools' Day") melted, the children put on shorts and sandals (I kid you not; we're a guilt-no-more family) and went out.

The back hall looked like a joke, and the children were like little cartoon children, smudged and smeared, bare legs blackened, Hollywood guttersnipe faces glowing.

However, the backyard looked like a dump. The ground was soft enough for wonderful holes to be dug, which were dug. There was (and probably still is, I'm not going to go check) a broken wooden chair over by the tree, flattened cardboard boxes strewn around, milk jugs, garden tools, an old bike with training wheels, etc etc. Underneath which, the barely visible grass was swimming in gooey melting mud. The side yard was the same, except without any grass at all.

If I had a camera and knew how to post a photo, I'd do it, except that I'd be too embarrassed.

No one on this block has to worry. The guilt-no-more family lives here!

Processed Wonderful Pregnancy Food!!!

2008-03-22T10:58:00.001-05:00

Good Day to You Family!
Above and below I have provided a few photos of what I was allowed to get away with yesterday at the grocery store. The joys of pregnancy abound! The crown jewel (which even the pregnant wife couldn't help scorning even in her condition) is a yogurt that is "kid friendly" which means that it contains M&Ms to spice up that otherwise dreary and boring vanilla extra-sweetened yogurt. This "kid friendly" yogurt clocks in at 200 calories, has 30 grams of sugar and 15% of your daily value for saturated fats. I feel its my duty as a father to sample these kid friendly items to determine what is suitable for a little shim. Now, these bad boys also set you back about $1.00 each, so to make Shim the "cool kid" at school, we'll, naturally, have to supply one a day for each school day which will approximately equal (5 school days * 4 weeks a month * 9 school months *1$ each ) $180/3600 calories alone for cool yogurt + additional yogurts for after school snacks and yogurts to impress little friends. Needless to say I think Breyers will benefit greatly from the additional of our little friend in the world. Now if you are a senior family in our little organization and have a few more mouths to feed, for example the N-crew, your bill will be multiplied 6 fold to equal $1080 a school year just to compete with our yogurt coolness. Just remember, Yo-Crunch, as its called, comes with added Vitamins A&D and live and active cultures, so that is a small price to pay for your child's health :)

Joe

Reprieve from the Madhouse

2008-03-11T15:52:00.002-05:00

Dear Friends:
We are gathered here today to celebrate the liberation of one family. This family has been cooped up in fewer square feet than are needed, looking at the former front window (broken by one of the younger members of the family who shall remain nameless, but whom we shall call Gee-oh), and reduced to eating Cheesy Tortillas. Four times a week. Cold.

There have been quarrels, my friends, and tears. A few bright moments when Daddy has the day off and we (or some non-pregnant portion of us) can go to Menards and unwind among the power tools. And occasional moments of greatness, as when we watched Guys and Dolls together, all of us marvelling at Marlon Brando's lack of talent -- though he does look good in a hat.

And today -- today, ladies and gentlemen, the temperature has soared to the balmy 45-50 degree range. The children are running around -- voluntarily -- in fresh air, wearing only t-shirts! I have the door open so the smell from the baking chicken doesn't overwhelm me.

Vitamin D! Exercise! we may avoid raving madness after all. Thank the Lord.

Prego Victory

2008-03-09T18:09:00.004-05:00

When it comes to the costs of raising a child, I thought I was ahead of my time. Being a particularly demanding child, I caused my parents a significantly larger investment than my other brothers and sisters (except for Tony, but he's another issue altogether) and therefore I thought I would be ahead of the game when Shim enters the world and begins draining the good ole' USAA account. I know what diapers cost, I know what Catholic private schools on the East Coast cost, I know what hockey camps cost (not that Shim's mother would let Shim go, but its a good thing to know) and I know what the projected tuition for Harvard will be in the year 2026 (approximately 1 Billion dollars plus cost of living and dues to Blue Organic Living Monthly). However, I did not calculate one cost that is quite significant and therefore let this be a warning to those who are a little farther back on the road to victory/parenthood than I am.

Maternity clothing/accessories/technology is like the wedding business, one big criminal mafia that will look you right in the face and charge you obscene amounts of cash for adding a piece of elastic to a shirt that was crappy from the beginning. They are more than happy to create these over priced pieces of trash for just about every week of pregnancy, so that if you bought into the scheme, your pregnant wife would be purchasing several wardrobes a month. And since the value of elastic is significantly higher than the value of gold when it is haphazardly sown into the front of a cotton t-shirt that is supposedly designed for women in the first 1/5 of their 2nd trimester who are carrying a boy ... you see what I am saying.

Luckily for me, my wife is cheaper than me and so we bring you the following Prego Victory tale:

It has recently been brought to my attention, by my wife, that the jacket she currently owns makes her look like a grade schooler whose parents never wash her clothes and because of this the jacket has begun to stink. It should be noted that a pregnant woman has a sense of smell that rivals most blood hounds with which she can detect funk/grossness/yuckiness/mildewy smell from several miles a way depending on the wind. With this in mind we set out to secure for her a coat from the mall.

Now the problem should be clear, coats normally made during this time of the year are very cheap/ on clearance, because of the rapidly approaching spring. But those coats with the addition of elastic are quite expensive. So, we resolved to find a good coat on clearance that would do for the time being that would hopefully get her through the last cold months and could possibly be worn in a non-prego state.

Well, we searched and searched and the selection was quite picked over at most of the large department stores. The coats were on clearance but were still in the many hundreds of dollars or in the extremely hideous category. Either way, I was ready to throw in the towel and begin the necessary preparations to purchase the elastic waist banded jacket.

On a last minute whim, we decided to go into Banana Republic. Now if you know anything about Banana Republic (I heard rumors that Ed shops there....) you know that if you go inside you better be ready to step up to the plate and pay the high price coinciding with the privilege of wearing their apparel. You don't go into BR unless you are ready to play the game. So, needless to say, we didn't really have that high of hopes of success. We proceeded straight back to the clearance section on the back wall with the other paupers and suddenly a coat caught my eye on the last rung of the bottom shelf. It was several sizes bigger than anything that Gabby had tried on before, but because we were at our wits end, she tried on the coat anyway. It was as if the coat was tailored for a prego Gabby! But this was not the greatest part of the prego success story, this jacket was being essentially given away by BR for the pittance of only $20!!!!!! We honestly thought it was a joke.

In conclusion, for all you deal seeking Peases out there, here is a true success story to be contended with and I challenge you to try.

Snowing

2008-02-28T16:50:00.003-06:00

Let me just say, this winter has been so nostalgic for me! It reminds me of the winters of my youth (pronounced "yoot" for those of you not in the know).

I would post a beautiful pic here, but I'm tech illiterate. Besides, you are all looking at it too, through your analog windows.

Downstairs, the children are hollering, but in a good way. And me -- I'm making "seafood divan" out of the old Joy of Cooking for dinner. This dish involves canned tuna, cooked broccoli, bechamel sauce, and PIMIENTOES. Dang. I guess I'll have to stock up next time I wear my hair net and shirtwaist to the Piggly Wiggly where they bag your groceries and look at you funny if you aren't wearing white gloves.

One of my favorite -- albeit somewhat irreverent -- blogs is www.junecleaverafterasix-pack.blogspot.com Just thought you'd like to know.

Fruitless Daydreams

2008-02-24T16:17:00.002-06:00

In my current daydream -- inspired by a weary, un-Sunday-ish trip to Rainbow -- John and I live on a shady, tree-lined city street that has many children, all well brought up and from intact homes, whose parents do not buy snack packs of anything at all, and where it is always, oh, about 69 degrees and slightly breezy.

I slip on the comfortable shoes that are neatly lined up near the back door, grab my hempen shopping basket, grab the toddler by the hand, and walk out. No need to lock up, my neighbors are looking out for my older children, who are gardening in the vast but somehow manageable vegetable patch over by the babbling creek.

The toddler and I walk two blocks, waving at the happy still independent elderly and the smiling, decent adults who are out doing various constructive things. Finally we come to the corner and there it is: the neighborhood shops! There are three of them, none bigger than an ordinary storefront!

We start at the butcher/dairy. We buy one pound of chicken (locally farmed, fed organic chicken kibble) half a gallon of milk, and a small wedge of parmesan cheese. This takes four minutes. The toddler has not yet even noticed that I am still holding her hand.

Next we wander to the grocer. I buy green beans (from the farmers in 30 minutes out, who don't use pesticides), seven small but sweet pears, dried apricots (OK, probably not local, but lovingly and humanely produced, you understand) and a bottle of red wine, which the state in a fit of practicality has finally allowed grocers to carry. The toddler is getting antsy, so I give her one apricot to chew on. This has all taken 12 minutes. My bag is heavy but not too much.

Finally we go to the bakery/specialty shop, run by Catholic hippies -- Chippies! They donate to the local food shelf and give jobs to the Downs syndrome kids in the neighborhood. Here the toddler and I buy one loaf of their whole wheat bread, paying $3.50 for it but gladly, since the owners have fourteen adopted children and mill their own organic spelt. Five minutes gets us out the door.

Back home after a refreshing and energy-renewing stroll, the toddler plays with the generous and sweet-tempered 11-year-old while I make chicken and potato curry, steam the green beans, set out the bread, crack open the wine.

Superguy comes home and we have a fabulous family meal.

The children do the dishes willingly.

World's Messiest Mom Joins Blog

2008-02-23T18:35:00.002-06:00

No more guilt, that's my new motto. As I stare at the heap of children's books in front of the bookshelf, as I avoid the mountain of laundry fermenting on the floor of the revolting laundry room, I pause and take a moment.

Since this is the guilt no more blog, I need to be a founding member, since my house and my brain both provide templates of guilt-no-more housekeeping and thinking, respectively. I think of it as a charitable outreach to all those people who have guilt over the less than perfect state of their organizational lives.

You in the family all know who I am. Hopefully, when Superguy (the DH) shows me how to use our technology, I will post photos and you can all lean back and heave one large sigh of relief and say to your spouses, "At least our house isn't THAT BAD."

Happy "Valentine's" Day!

2008-02-15T09:50:00.004-06:00

Happy Valentine's Day, all! Although, to be technical, Valentine's Day was actually yesterday. And if we are going to be really technical, yesterday wasn't really "Valentine's Day" either - it was Cyril and Methodius Day (as mom so helpfully and accurately pointed out). Valentine's day was taken away from him sometime ago, because, let's face facts here , we don't even really know who this St. Valentine IS who has become the Catholic equivalent of Cupid these days. There were Sts. Valentine - several of them, and they seem to have been Roman-era martyrs, but we don't really know more than that, and it does seem a little unfair to have a Feast Day celebrating "That one unspecified Holy guy who had a very common Roman Name." It makes much more sense to give a day to those stalwart (and historically specific) men who converted the Slavs and gave them the beauty/oddity that is the Cyrillic alphabet!!
SO, Happy belated Cyril and Methodius Day!!! Dobrey Dyen!!!